The Ramblings of My Soul!

swan song

2010-04-26T09:09:00.003+05:30

she tried to come back here... but the soul isn't as chatty anymore.

she leaves you with this and wishes you do all you can to make that one dream come true!

phir milenge!

chutti!

2010-02-27T09:16:00.003+05:30

a beautiful sense of ease engulfs her each time she sets out to travel.. though off late she's realized she's become super comfortable in the 1 hall kitchen she happily calls home!

she's on her way to Kolkata... a wedding, a tattoo, friends and some wine! so it's a lot of reasons to celebrate!! (anyone wants to tell her what to do and where to go in call is most welcome!! she can do with all the travel advice!) Speaking of travel advice.. a newly married friend who's moved to Cal says "get yourself a tube of mosquito repellent... the damn BUGgers are everywhere!!" ;)

it's nice to have even the mere trace of a family around you (for short spurts in time) and this is a full blown big fat Bengali wedding! What's a punju babe (yes - purely self proclaimed) doing at a Bengali wedding..? Punju babe's bua married into a bengali family.. so in the interest of national integration this part of the family is Bengali!

bhai's back from Dubai and it's a joy to have him back... it just feels more comforting... as friends have started to move out of Namma Bengaluru to Aamchi Mumbai it's getting quiet... Bhai is great company and great entertainment... needless to say he loves to pamper her! ;) And so he is duly woken up at 6:30 AM.. not allowed brush and told to sit beside her as she tries to catch the airport bus in her trusted jonga! Mad dash... bus has just left the bus stop closest to home... we see it turning away from the next one and then they finally overtake it and stop it! don't kill her for it but she wants to say "life nahi hai laddoo" :P

her lifetime itch has been the excess baggage - not per what the airline allows... she's luckily kept "just" below that all her life except for a couple occasions...! But be it 2 days or 10... it continues to be an overstuffed backpack and a laptop bag bursting at the seams with stuff she couldn't fit in the backpack!! People - serious tips on travelling light needed... please do remember that she is a Virgo! ;)

Apart from the tumults of travel it's been a good week... she's learning to ignore work.. (to the extent that she's on leave during a client visit!)... she's also become fairly more impulsive! (to think that age would mellow... not likely!) A Monday night at Java city for good coffee and chicken lasagna... a Thursday night with bhai at the new Tunday Kebab's place in Koramangala! She was wrapping up work as bhai came over and then it was an experiment in apple vodka and litchi juice... (they vowed never to play around with the sanctity of litchi juice by mixing it with flavored vodka ever again!) Well they land up at the Tunday Kebab place at 10... the choices are no brainers.. the only mistake is the mutton korma which tastes like chyavanprash (but tends to grow on you after 2 bites) - and they are well fed on scrumptious food and out by 10:25!! now THAT ladies and gentlemen is FAST food!!!

so such are the joys of a beautiful life... compounded by this conversation...

Roomie from hostel: gud gud.. u will turn i guess 26 this year

atleast start thinkin abt marriage

Yours Truly: i have turned 26 last year sweetheart!

Roomie from hostel: ohhhhh

Yours Truly: but i'm totally enjoying this... friday ko i was out of office early to pack and stuff - last min shopping.. and a guy walks up to m and asks - "do u stay in jnc hostel?"

jnc is a graduation college!!!!!

Roomie from hostel: ha ha ha... gud gud

Yours Truly: and then shekhar for some vague reason thinks im just 21!!! (grinned and blushed for a second time! :P)

and now u've also set me back by a year!

:) i like this!!

Brahmaz Mistake... Really!

2010-02-18T20:23:00.004+05:30

A long and peaceful friday of lazing around in bed and waking up only to eat had plans of culminating in a nice peaceful dinner with friends (and that too without the liquids known to make it a terror-ible saturday morning!) It was nothing more than what Dire Strait puts as..

"Stepping out Angellucci's for my coffee beans

checking out the movies and magazines.."

Apart from one tiny thing.. Granpa had to be dropped to the bus stop since he was on his way to Chennai for a jamming session with Brahmaz Mistake (who were readying to perform Live in namma Bengaluru at Kyra this coming weekend!) Whose to know whether it was the joy of a huge bowl of spinach meatball soup or the satisfaction brought forth by the chocolate shake that triggered her to insanely suggest... that lets all go. Two pounced at the idea and the one remaining was given no choice!

After making use of the washroom services provided by the cafe the next stop was a petrol pump to tank up on the gas and reserve on the petrol... And well... with one man and his backpack off went the four of them! The other three mentally resigned to using their fingers as a brush the next morning!

Take off: 10:30 PM. The joys of the elevated highway experienced as various forms of rock played on the car stereo and lo and behold they were on the Chennai highway! Yes 'when we remember we are all mad, life stands explained!' A couple of calls were made to "to be harassed hosts" with them being warned that we will touchdown by 3/4 AM to their beautiful newly wed abode!

Stops for loading up on peppermint and water and pee-ing later as conversation started to mellow (the excitement still soared) and yours truly at the wheel dodging trucks and buses as her jonga responded with wonderful ease.. the music changed to bollywood item numbers! They are after all the very sing-along-keep-you-awake numbers perfectly suited for the dance into the night! From 'Mai disco.. Tu disco.. Duniya hai ek Disco... Disco 82!' to 'A remix of Ishq tera tadpave' to 'No one so saaxy in the whole galaaxy' to 'Laila o Laila' they sung along to it all! Well the three of them sung along while Bhai's avid protests were turned a deaf ear to!

Well... in the neighbourhood of 3 AM they begin the house hunting for the beautiful home of the newly wed couple also playing host to the bride's parents (but were given no choice except to provide us shelter for the night ;) )A couple of roundabouts in jalebi town and we were where we wanted to be with full confidence exhibited by the lady navigator!

Halla Bol! ;) We tried to be as quiet as possible... as she made herself comfortable on a gadda in the living room she looked at the couple and mentioned "you guys should sleep" and pat came the reply "abey mere gadde pe baith ke bolti hai so jao!" ~ sheepish grin ~ Extra gaddas were found and the living room turned into a dorm as these 4 madhatters and the lovely couple snoozed into the night!

Whose to know when the world around woke up! She woke up when she heard her name being mentioned in pun to another newly wed couple who obviously had the decency to arrive to another fellow couple's house at a more earthly hour of say 8 / 9 AM (it's tough to be sure with the beautiful stupor of a back straightening sleep which is most welcome after a long drive!). The smells of exquisite hot coffee, the luck of cold Chennai whether and the satisfaction of a yummy warm home cooked breakfast! Kudos to the hospitality at such short notice!

Well.. it goes on to become the story of borrowed t-shirts, face washes, combs and kajals to make themselves presentable for the rest of the day! Ah yes... the plan was to drive back the same afternoon... but as the powers that be spun the web the plan became to jam along and leave on Sunday afternoon (which needless to say stretched to evening) ;) Again the protests of a pretty protesting bhai fell on deaf ears and he was silenced into a nodding agreement.

Meanwhile she was patting herself on the back for accomplishing this night driving feat (the first of its kind undertaken by her.. she's always had a qualified co driver to take over as needed on other occasions!) So well.. she takes a bow! :)

De Mello's studio beckoned and the sound of muzik was soul stirring.. a practice cum jamming session is always fun and this one even more so as the protesting bhai discovered his talent for being a 'drumductor' (akin to an orchestra conductor but with instructions being actioned out only to the drummer who had a penchant for forgetting Audioslave's Be Yourself!). As the drummer's bro decided to sit at the drums all heads turned and a conversative silence fell over the studio! His 'sound check' like drum roll matched beautifully by the Lead Guitarist was mesmerizing! Echoes of 'isko baadme layenge drums pe nahi to expectation high ho jayega' reverberated alongwith the applause! Good? He was brilliant!!

The Bass Guitarist and his beautiful professional photographer of a wife lugged around the laptops and the camera equipment to make the band look good on a poster! The moment was achieved outside a Yamaha store on it's 'perfect' steps with minor experiments in light! All this post lunch and post another session at jamming just before dinner beckoned! (yeah they're a lot who likes to eat so the penchant for food is shared apart from it being just the muzik!)

The night found the four runaways at the Lead Guitarist's abode whose lovely mum made it home for all of them! The girls were given a comfortable change of clothes and our poor guitarist went "aila! teen teen mummy" as he saw them in mommy dearest's clothes! Another restful night and a yummy breakfast of parathas, aloo, apples and awwwsum chai later they were on their way to the studio. Oh yes.. they managed to have a bath this morning however the clothes continue to be the same and the brush was still their precious index fingers!

"I am a man who walks alone

And when I'm walking a dark road

At night or strolling through the park

When the light begins to change

I sometimes feel a little strange

A little anxious when it's dark.

Fear of the dark,fear of the dark"

deserves special mention for it almost cost our vocalist his voice! ;)

A takeaway lunch of kathi rolls and delightful milkshakes found them as they practised! This she figures inspired Bhai who decided to fiddle with the guitar, the drummer (yeah the awwsum one) and the lead guitarist to take on the avatar of the vocalist as they belted out something totally amazing however unknown even to them! They hope someone's deciphered the lyrics with the recording that was made! ;) Ladies and Gentlemen... ~ Applause! ~

With this and with the sounds of blackest eyes, imagine and fear of the dark in her head it was time to drop one newly wed to the station for them to make it back to hyd and for them to tank up on gas again and head to... "Sweet Home Alabama".

Lots of hugs and "cya next weekend" later they were sad to say but they were on their way!

Thus began a frantic search for Red Bull! Several petrol pumps and tiny stores later just as they hit the highway awaiting them was a CCD! Screeching off it and stopping right behind an innova their moment of eureka had been achieved. A flask was dug out from the car boot which limitedly keeps coffee warm.. 4 energy drinks and a flask full of coffee alongwith 2 boxfulls of mint and they were set for take off! Little did they realize that there's little that replaces a red bull.. and not the least of it is something called a "Cloud 9" whose taste went from being described as rose water to rotten grape juice to water mixed with gulal! ;)

The drive back was peaceful with a large number of stops to pee providing sufficient opportunity to stare at the starry sky above, breathe in fresh air, and spray on water into tired eyes! The music continued to be variants of rock this time around! :D ~ small mercies ~

Cheers to a whirlwind surprise weekend with na rehne ka thikana, na khane peene ka thikana!

"You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will live as one"

- John Lennon

PS: Hope to see you at Kyra on Sunday where Brahmaz Mistake is performing Live!

drops of jupiter

2010-02-07T21:07:00.002+05:30

it's weirdly fun to drive to office at an unearthly hour of 7 AM on a saturday morning... but it's strangely pacifying that she enjoyed it coz that's what the next 4 days are like! it's a quiescence that fills her heart as she races through whatever few cars decide to be around at that time... and magically songs to stir her up also found their way on the car stereo!

the weekend has been luck since she's been able to come back by noon and crash! her body stirs sometime in the evening and an alarming look at the clock says 'hey get up and have a bath! u have a movie to catch!' lucky for her Granpa also decides to be a 'bit' late and well off they go to Lido Mall to catch Ishqiya... halfway there Granpa asks "but where are we going?" and after a moment of profound silence as the traffic scene is patently intercepted she lets out a loud and overwhelming "oh shit!"... They were headed in the udderly opposite direction of another theatre and well... luckily a couple of u-turns could salvage the situation!! That said she had botched up earlier in the AM by paying 700 bucks for tickets that come at 440 - thankfully to later realize that she had paid for the popcorn, coke combo and by some twist of luck that for a change worked in her favour she had saved 61 bucks!

This is where it had started to become 'that kind of day!' ;) So after conversation over cardamom tea they made their way into the theatre... enjoyed the movie.. saw it till the closing credits (for after all 700 bucks had to be vasoolofied!) and then decided to meet a long lost buddy on MG Road! They hit the new soup bar at Spencers "Au Bon Pain" and had a delightful experience with the varieties of soups, sandwiches and deserts! You should go - you will come back changed at the foodie experience!

Speaking of food she had tried an experiment in her kitchen which strangely (yes you could say it was a fairly strange weekend) was nice! It was a lil beet of jeera, sautéed with some palak leaves, variously colored capsicum and sprouts - mixed in with leftover rice - seasoned with soya sauce, chilli sauce, mustard sauce and an egg cracked in! Voila - Salad ala Fried Rice! ;)

Yes food has always offered her complacence and her girth does speak for it! ;) But she figures a few healthy choices (as she has now consciously started making) can keep her safe! So on a slow sunday afternoon as she OD'd on veggie shopping and made her way back home she knew something in her heart... she will leave you with two sets of lyrics to tell you the story and continue to smile mysteriously with a twinkle in her eye (she's found her twinkle after a long time.. and plans to celebrate it with chocolate pastry - a li'l chocolate here and there she maintains is still healthy! ;) )

If the question is...

"I got wiring loose inside my head

I got books that I never ever read

I got secrets in my garden shed

I got a scar where all my urges bled

I got people underneath my bed

I got a place where all my dreams are dead

Swim with me into your blackest eyes"

- Porcupine Tree

Then it was only natural for the answer to be laden with her favourite character of the english language...

"Tell me, did you fall for a shooting star?

One without a permanent scar

And then you missed me

While you were looking for yourself out there?

Now that she's back from that soul vacation

Tracing her way through the constellation, hey

She checks out Mozart while she does Tae-Bo

Reminds me that there's room to grow, hey

But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet?

Did you finally get the chance

To dance along the light of day

And head back to the Milky Way?

And tell me, did Venus blow your mind?

Was it everything you wanted to find?

And then you missed me

While you were looking for yourself out there

Can you imagine no first dance, freeze-dried romance

Five-hour phone conversation

The best soy latte that you ever had, and me?

But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet?

Did you finally get the chance

To dance along the light of day

And head back toward the Milky Way?"

- Drops of Jupiter

placid waters

2010-01-30T21:09:00.001+05:30

it's been a couple weeks... the great Bar has visited and passed back into his hibernation! it was a nice roller coaster of drinking and eating the 5 odd days he decided to make his presence felt!

Granpa's getting old and your truly is getting fat.. so we can use someone tall to change the scenery for us! ;) A trip to outside of town to quietly sit by a lake.. to talk n talk n talk and then to create noise pollution by blaring music on the car stereo while clicking away on the camera! the poses (and the posers) are all amazing!

Coffee.. tea and a few conversations.. her propensity to talk over the phone has increased by leaps and bounds.. she's kinda dreading her phone bill!

The 'parents' have begun finding 'the eligible bachelors' and she has half a feeling that more than 70% of them will have their cars toilet papered! ;)

The most dreaded time in a working year aka the performance rating decided to go well and the boss tells her to stop working! ;) Lord may help if she decides to take him literally!

The fridge was stocked up with fruits and veggies and she plans to go the ghaas phoos way (whatever happened to saving chickens and eating vegetarians!) for Feb! May the force be with her!! (she blames it on the insanity of a passing moment!)

~ that's all folks! looking forward to a new tattoo sometime in march! it's gotten too real to be ignored! (which reminds me.. i have to think up one 'more' for theadventuresofatraveller!)

(it's too settled to be the start of a year - she needs to stir things up!)

Makar Sankranti

2010-01-16T19:50:00.002+05:30

the day dawned.. bright with promise! she had a work call to wrap up... ~ugh! However she had done the beautiful deed of setting up an out of office.. and declining her evening meetings by categorically telling people she was going to watch a play and hence won't be available!

post work call she had a nice loooong conversation which led to a dumb smile on her face for the day... and then well... it's a holiday.. it's peaceful.. snoooooooze!

she wakes up to hunger and the need to check some mail but not the wish to c(r)ook! and so that's what she does... picks up her ol' faithful (which happens to be her trusted thinkpad).. freshens up into a vague gypsy skirt (of course the t-shirt as well! :P) and sets out to a quiet lil cafe to occupy the corner seat in it's balcony!

it's a fuzzy evening... a cappuccino with a whiff of cinnamon and then some smoked chicken can only make you smile some more as old old buddies catch up on gtalk while she discovers her need to write! a while later it's time for the play... and granpa aka Mite makes his grand entrance to pick her up.. confirms that his booking has been made for the play (where someone says if you booked it it's there! ask at the counter once you get there!... fair enough!)

she drives through namma bengaluru's holiday evening traffic and they make it in the nick of time.. granpa steps to the counter where he is rudely told "hey! this is what they gave us and this is what we have.. ur not on it!" Furious ol gramps tries to call the ticket lady and gets no response... even more furious he messages the ticket lady to say "u dint book us n we r here!". The place luckily has a lil cafe where they serve chai to peace out grampy...! Halfway through a cuppa he gets a call from ticket lady... post staring at the ringing monstrosity for a few seconds he figures it's a good idea to take the call... and so he does. ~ahem! only to be made to realize that... "sir.. your sms said 15th and not 14th! ur booked for the 15th". Lo and behold follows a litany of apologies from granpa who feels terrible about ticking off a lady for no fault of hers! (he's cute that ways!)... :D

Ta Da.. two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl.... amends are made as friends are called to figure options.. it's zeroed down to a new italian takeaway place in Jayanagar called "Veeke's and Thomas" and then a romantic comedy! (granpa got lucky she decided to pick something else instead.. ;) ). So there we were at V&T surrounded in it's comfortable ambiance of white cane and warm people with a delectable menu at our disposal! Seating space is enough if u;ve ordered and are waiting with 2 tables to serve that purpose... and the music is soft and classical rock at a very conversational volume! After figuring 3 types of pasta's (halfs - yes they have half portions too.. variety really is the spice of a pleasant bengaluru evening) and 1 shepherd's pie their heart is taken my the 'mango cheese cake'! This much for 250 bucks! Yes - pause and stare! Some of the yummiest Italian food at this price.. in recyclable packaging! 'Italian Street Food!'

Well... they carry their food (devoid of plastic packaging) and drive off to pick up the 'romantic comedy!' Flipping through the pages this catches both their eyes... 'Dogs. Donkeys. Denial. There's no place like home!' and well that's what it becomes! (yes.. the slow romance of the evening has gotten to her as she picks up the stereo's remote instead of her cell phone while getting out of the jonga!)

The setup is complete... the forks are laid.. the bottle of water kept handy.. and the movie is on! Cheers to the li'l joys of a big life!

The slow pace of the movie with the delectable taste of the food recognizable in distinct spices peaces them out as both forget the turmoils of work and recollect their joys!

The food and the movie both come highly recommended! And here's where to find the takeout:

South Bangalore Kitchen, 22, Ground floor, 5th Cross, 24th Main Road, JP Nagar, Phase 2

Ph: +919972133533

Bon Apetit!

bas yun hi..

2010-01-14T17:29:00.003+05:30

life has decided to always happen to her in various ways...

say work.. and the good growth that happened.. it was a project she refused.. and then eventually it made it her way coz the other person got sacked.. (yeah.. imagine the horror of doing a project like that!).. but it's changed her world... and here she is standing on a soap box and telling world how much she loves her job! (~touchwood!)

a konkan trip... it brought people and places closer to her in ways she had not thought.. it's given her great buddies and a love for sea food as well! :D here she is doing bbq's with the very best of them eating it merrily! such is the simple warmth of life.. (and several other trips)

her car.. her happy lil jonga! Bengaluru.. the autos! how she managed to save up enough she'll never know.. destined? just about maybe!! it personifies what it has proudly written on it's black lil behind.. "every declaration of independence is an act of adventure!"

her lava lamp - she can stare at it making funny shapes at her.. it'll warm her heart.. it'll make her thoughtful.. it'll simply be the source that silences the jangling after a long day and peace-ifies her!

her love of people.. which gives into love of places so that she can escape the people! ;) the idle chatter of a warm cafe.. the lonely walker down the road... the ability to get lost in the eyes of fellow travellers... it keeps her busy and keeps her warm.. !

her fondness of the guitar... it was just a moment in time as the six strings were strummed and she stood there frozen with her soul in a frenzy!

her paintings... she started off with practised scenery... now it's just abstracts that fill her soul and pour on her canvas! she loves the conversations they create... she loves being able to look at them and see their meaning change as life around her changes!

and then conversations such as these to keep her amused while she sips on blackberry ice tea and munches on apple cake...

barman: i was in SFO this new year

that the gay capital of US

we were sick of seeing guys together

finallly in the club we so some guy girl thing happening

me: ok so u mean ladka log (and not ladki log) maaro line 2u?

barman: y will ladka log

i meant in SFO.. there the gay rules are very liberal

(here comes the high point!)

barman: party mein i stuck between 2 women

me: ahaan!

barman: gay they were

me: u lived every man's secret fantasy!

(the 'climax!')

barman: 10 mins dance ke baad paata chala they were dancing with each other and not with me

me: :D :D :D :D

barman: i felt used

me: ok i take back the fantasy wala remark...

but dada think about it

'used by 2 women' - can it get better? ;)

barman: not really

me: :D such is life dada..

Maja ni Life..

2010-01-05T22:51:00.003+05:30

Scene 1: Punju surrounded by 3 Gujjus who giver her credit for finding the 3 most unique gujjus of this world! (well.. she agrees without protest coz u have to meet them to figure it!)

Scene 2: These mad hatters are at Mondy's in aamchi Mumbai ordering pot loads of food and pitcherfuls of beer! And then... she spots this lonely firang babe looking remorseful and having a cup of coffee...

Scene 3: Wild persuasion to get Mommy aka Shekhar to talk to her. When all else fails the classics of "truth or dare" come to the fore! She walks upto the babe and says hi! gets her name for him and walks back..

Scene 4: The dude "finally!" (after the 4th pitcher of beer and the sheer persuasive prowess of your truly - as the other 2 gujjus watch the show) walks upto her!!

Scene 5: He has a 15-20 minute long nice animated conversation with her!! She's alone in the city.. last day.. stays in Bandra... wants to roam around but is a lil scared...

Scene 6: He walks back beer mug in hand... and... he hasn't asked her for her email id even.. (~thwacks head and vows to not do so much mehnat ever!)

Well... it's a city that always proves fun and always rejuvenates! A walk down the causeway and some more beer at 'harbour view'. (And the view is amazing!!) she meets a couple new buds Budweiser! ;) Twilight sets it's curtain and it's time to head to the other side of town.. away from the bustle and into the night.. but before the night settles there's stil 2 gujjus and her and a local train!!

Conversation starts with: you were alone at home? the bar was accessible? you dint tell me? and defense is put up to say you said you will be with your girlfriend and ends on how much cleavage was the 'new bud' showing - and when a guy calls it obscene what's a girl to say! ;) By the time the 3 wellas decided to get off the entire train compartment knew that they eat merry, drink merry, are nerdy, goofy and really don;t care.. the expressions they got were "hey don't go.. we have to go all the way upto virar.. who will entertain us!!" ;)

On her way home she sensed a beautiful blue aura with a demure yellow star on one shoulder and a grinny naughty one on the left one! It felt nice to be able to feel the colors again.. even more so to have felt such happy ones!

Time to packup as the stars also begin to hide... 2 hours of sleep at night.. you obviously need to expect snoring on the aircraft from mumbai to namma bengaluru (esp given that it decides to cradle her while hovering for an extra 45 mins in the air!) The gujju back home goes "think like a gujju! kam paison me zyada ghoomne ko mila!" :D :D

A sub packed.. a cab ride... car retrieved.. and a dash to office.. thus begins the new year.. :) And it's feeling good! for now she sits looking at her lava lamp making weird shapes while listening to Mark Knopfler and soaks in the good karma!

And oh ya.. what would you call "majaa ni life" in russian? (for the benefit of the gujju who was too shareef to get an email id!) ;)

how happy how high!

2010-01-01T09:55:00.002+05:30

it was a fun evening at home with the bar at easy access... the bbq sizzling... and chocolate desserts oozing sin..! and we decided to read each others pasts, presents and futures with cards!

closed out on 2009 with a card reading (out of regular playing cards) which said that there's bits of turmoil and change is for the best! It asked her to let the past stay right there and not take into the next year... it indicated an engagement or a wedding...

rang in 2010 with a tarot card reading which was saying the same things as the previous one... and it said the engagement is either 10 weeks from now or July! (~ laughed!) And then cards of family indicated the same for her! (~ freaked!)

it's a great year based on the fork she chooses.... destiny has been known to find her on forks she's been desperate to avoid! so for now.. she takes it as it come! (but 2 readings from 2 different people on 2 different sets of cards saying exactly the same things did freak her out a bit! and... both readers mentioned they had never seen such clear cards before!)

and oh yes... she will continue to 'over indulge' in the good things of life and not manage to save much! (dang! she really thought she could!!) ;)

apart from that she's been thinking she will start exercising, eating 'healthy' (healthy is not equal to less! :P ), writing (she figures it keeps her happy) and reading! (she's been enjoying catching up on all the reading this quiet period has allowed... she hopes to continue!)

speaking of reading here's an excerpt from Hugh Macleod's http://gapingvoid.com ... wishing you find food for your soul this year!

Welcome to the Hunger...

The Hunger to do something creative.

The Hunger to do something amazing.

The Hunger to change the world.

The Hunger to make a difference.

The Hunger to enjoy one’s work.

The Hunger to be able to look back and say, Yeah, cool, I did that.

The Hunger to make the most of this utterly brief blip of time Creation has given us.

The Hunger to dream the good dreams.

The Hunger to have amazing people in our lives.

The Hunger to have the synapses continually fired up on overdrive.

The Hunger to experience beauty.

The Hunger to tell the truth.

The Hunger to be part of something bigger than yourself.

The Hunger to have good stories to tell.

The Hunger to stay the course, despite of the odds.

The Hunger to feel passion.

The Hunger to know and express Love.

The Hunger to know and express Joy.

The Hunger to channel The Divine.

The Hunger to actually feel alive.

The Hunger will give you everything. And it will take from you, everything. It will cost you your life, and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it. But knowing this, of course, is what ultimately sets you free.

... and oh yeah... it started with wine and ended on a caramel liqueur with the works in between! (she really believed she could fly!) ;)

There is no charge for Awsomeness!

2009-12-30T20:58:00.002+05:30

And sometimes it's the simplest things that flash in your face and you stop in tracks.. here she was sitting with a glass of wine as it struck her.. "hey.. take it as it comes!". In that moment it was so profound it took away all her fears.. it lightened mountains off her and she breathed easy!! :)

She's daring to hope again.. after ages... keep your fingers crossed!

Meanwhile her lil 2 year old brat has been getting her to discover laughter and he's her lil Kung Fu Panda!! :D The latest off him is "I'm going to Thailand to meet nice nice Divas!"

Skadoosh!

yes.. tabula rasa

2009-12-25T21:30:00.002+05:30

this christmas day mayn't be special specifically in terms of being white or merry or christmasy! but yes.. it's a clean slate.. a new life.. a new beginning...

the beginning did enforce a major cleanup operation of her living spaces... loads and loads of junk got thrown out.. incencse sticks loaded on and lit dutifully every day... the kitchen is spanking clean and good as new! good karma flows.. chocolate pastries and sausages rest in the fridge...

the ghosts in her abode also seem to smile...

new year resolution - a healthier life!! breakfast!! and some exercise! that's it! ~ now that's not too ambitious is it?!

namma bengaluru becomes lonelier as the days go by... it's just gramps n me in town now... trying to get "Mommy aka Shekhar" to move.. hoping it works out! need some excitement!!

meanwhile.. flights ready for takeoff to mumbai for new years!! cya!!

tabula rasa

2009-10-11T20:45:00.000+05:30

... eventually...

Running..

2009-09-20T00:14:00.001+05:30

the chaos of blue beads as they jangle in the halting sunlight of a slow afternoon turns her within herself... she's avoiding her happy place in her head coz she has a feeling this time it will ache more than soothe...

her highest highs... her deepest lows.. they've all come and dealt her blows...

she knows she'd stopped talking... she knows coz she was avoiding facing herself.. sometimes it's really easy to take the easy way out.. what she didn't know at the time was it'll hit her so bad when she does take the time out... she needed to let her guard down and just talk it out...

and after she'd done it she found her tarot card to read "Under the auspices of Strength, the professional environment is in your favor provided you're prepared to stop struggling and let out your fears to someone who's willing to listen. There's no shame in taking a bit of a break and allowing your guard to drop a little. Work out whom to call, and talk it over until things seem clearer."

and in the evening boss walked by just to check on her.. she smiled... but she knew she needed the time out and she knew she wanted to just sit and pour out her heart (ok.. yeah tears out)..

friday night turned to 'defect resolution war rooms' and by 3 AM she was pooped enough to just hit the pillow and sleep... the quiescence of a saturday made its way on her and as the rain clouds decided to pour down so did her tears... she misses him... in such situations he's always been able to just hold her hand even if he's not really understood it and she's been able to find it in her..

someone told her something profound... "you feel this way coz u care... the other folks don't.. they won't... there's a learning involved here... you've gained in experience when such things happen.." and then they said what she's always told herself.. "learn from it.. take it in your stride and move on..."

She knows she can... and she just smiled... :)

It's just that sometimes in life you're like 'this close' to giving it up... and then unexpectedly someone will walk in just knowing exactly what it is... give u one look to say 'i believe in you' and 'i am there'. Sometimes... that's all you really need to get back in the game!

"when exhaustion gets tired... when agony doubles over in pain... when defeat waves a white flag... i will still be out there.. Running... running to the beat of my own drummer... running easy."

hypercity

2009-09-07T21:01:00.004+05:30

she's started coming back to this obsessively clean house with the quaint incense smells... she figures she does it so she's reminded less and less of him.. damn! who's she running from?!

oh well... once that tookover it was back to the normalcy of being able to run out to office without having a bath... cooking up an experiment in the kitchen.. and just sitting in the balcony to stare into space...

but... a parental storm is in the making... (yes they are coming... and to convince her to get married!) the whole world goes.. "so why don't you two get married..?!" (earlier it was family.. now it's work tooo!!!)

it's hard for most folks to figure she likes her work... they go "huh?!" and then go "~ sheesh! escapist!" or "omg!!!" or "workaholic!!"

how do you explain it that you like going nuts on weekdays and totally totally lazing around on a weekend with nothing much else to do except surf the net and order chinese food?! how do you explain that you like to look good for yourself and that you're in a very comfortable place being who you are and that you enjoy it without having to feel guilty about it any way?! (actually.. why should you explain it!)

oh well.. i hold my "peace"! ;)

of daaru and juaa

2009-08-29T05:00:00.003+05:30

i've gotten out of office at 6:30 PM and called Mish... she almost drops the phone in disbelief that yours truly who's Friday nights start at an average at 11:30 PM is out at the human hour of 630!!!! It calls for a celebration and by the time we're home all we can all do is CRASH! in an uneasy twist of sleepless fate I wake up at 4:30 AM (talk of a body clock that is udderly responsive!) and well for want of something better to do at that inhuman hour i remember the conversations over the week and laugh my heart out!

me: knock knock.. :)

jeetsachdeva: rathore here.. ram ram hai

me: :) kya haal hain?

jeetsachdeva : badiya hai ... bus humara lappy .... thoda bemar ho gya hai

me: haww.. kya hua?

rathore: ab kya batayen .... sab thik thak tha .... and one night we got drunk ... and sources say ... who were in senses ... tht we offered some to dear lappy also.. and the next morning .... and till now .. its in hangover ....

its in nehru place .... some major shot in mother board

(5 minutes) (i have been staring at the screen in disbelief!)

me: please keh do ye jhooth hai... main aur mere desk k aas paas ki junta hans hans k lot pot ho gaye hain!

rathore: nahi ... this is the hard fact of life and i have to live with this ....

nahi ye serious hai .... :(

me: i empathize but bahut funny hai!!!!!

rathore: hmmm .... ab jo log bhi iss ghatna ko sun ke haanse hai ... kam se kam .... mere lappy ke liye prey to kar dain .... shayad kal vo result sunayenge .... if it is going to work again or slept forever

me: please please please can i post this on my blog?

rathore: kya ??? blog ???

me: we will all pray

rathore: i hope .. ki main aapko mana karta aur aap post nahi karti ... but now i guess have no choice but to read this ...

[PS: now all u guys reading this had better pray for Rathore!]

And then, the best of Barman aka Dada

barman.arindam: u thr

me: yuppp

barman.arindam: busy? tumhara no. do

mera phone ka case ho gaya

RAce course mein gaya tha

mobilei alloed nahi hai paata nahi tha

cops caught me in the betting area with mobile

phone confiscate kar liya

mein to saaala dekhne ke liye gaya tha

oh log socha kuch bookie hai..

kuch bhi hota rheta hai mere saath yaar

bol raha hai 10000 fine do

phir phone milega

me: aisa aapke saath hi ho sakta hai!!!! the chosen one!!!

barman.arindam: daarubaaz suttebaaz ladkibaaz. ab sob ko paata chal gaya ki yeh to jua bhi khelta hai

kya pofile hai!!

u guyz shld be proud to know somone like me

me: :) jo sach hai vo kabhi na kabhi saamne aa hi jata

and this made me go back to Dada's dream of long black car, 4 daarubaaz friends... ek lamba highway and the song playing... "Ya Rabba!!"

This is a song I've started to sing quite often...

Dede koi jaan bhi agar... traffic be ho na... traffic pe ho na koi asar!

Road hai ya sazaa... aie meri car bata...

toot ta kyon nahi... jam ka silsila...!

Ya Rabba!!

~ enough of the insanity for one post i say!!

Recorded...

2009-07-25T00:21:00.003+05:30

There are these moments that you want to not forget for what they have meant to you...

After a particulalrly harried week for various reasons she get a call and it goes "Aneesha.. can I say something?"... She's amused and casually says "Sure". She gets blown away as she hears "It is refreshing to have you around! You are one of the few people who really know what she is doing" She smiles and says thank you.

Then in the after hours she gets pinged... (after a particularly harrowing experience)... 'Go home, please?' ..... She promises to be off in the next 30 minutes and to stay safe!

~ She's also advised to marry for money and not for love! ;) hee hee!

Thanks Charley.

Forbidden Lands!

2009-06-30T01:11:00.002+05:30

And this is the experience...

Kinnaur, Lahaul and Spiti with 78mm!

speeding on a jetplane!

2009-06-21T15:12:00.003+05:30

how did life become so complicated she wondered?

well not hers.. but around her poeple are being pushed and pulled by the fabric of society...

she sees people giving in to cravings (of various types) and it saddens her heart...

how people have started to 'chase' a dream instead of 'following' it...

how people refuse to fathom the simple joys of wheatflakes with milk and honey... (they'd rather think about the calories); a cup of green tea in the morning... (how can anything possibly be wrong with it?); rushing along without having a bath coz you know u'd rather sleep than feel the epitome of clean... (~ now that may well be a personal threshold! ;) ); getting a 'thank-you' note for good work done... (instead of fighting to get up higher); taking a walk in the rain... (without worrying about wetting your clothes.. duh!)... and of a first speeding ticket! ;)

The story of the speeding ticket goes like this... 11:30 AM still in the car and driving nice and peacefully to catch a jet 1 PM flight... suddenly you realize that it's Jet.. the last she remembers is their check in is 60 mins and not 40 like others! ~ thus begins the zipzapzoom through a myriad mix of cars on namma bengaluru's roads! The first police radar is something she notices and brakes... passes through without incident and then zipszapszooms again to reach namma airport which is 100 miles away! (~sheesh!)

12:15 PM entry.. meanwhile a call has been made and it is confirmed that our dude can reach 30 mins before boarding and we are still ok! As the man is loaded with bags and in his own words looks like a 'laptop salesman' he gets the parting hug and instructions to messgae once he's boarded... (after all she'll have to pick him up otherwise right!)

Well... habituated to the 120-130 speeds and empty roads she zipszapszooms again straight into the cops net. :'(

Cop: First extremely surprised that a girl was speeding and then..

"Madam.. ye gaadi tez ja raha tha"

Yours Truly: "sir kitna tez...?"

Cop: "Madam speed limit 80 hai"

Yours Truly: praying teh cop doesnt smell the beer for breakfast on her breath or spot the bottles of booze in her car steps oout and asks: "sir fine kitna hai"

Cop: amazed again at the fact that she hasnt try to patao him etc..

Yours Truly meanwhile continues to pray

Cop: 600

Yours Truly: (knowing this is high) "aap receipt de do main fine deti hai"

Cop: 300

Yours Truly: ~ smiles smugly and heaves a sigh of relief coz that's the amount she has in her wallet and 5 bucks more... takes out the money, hands it over and stands meekly like a good kid.

Cop: smiles at her and says thank you madam

Yours Truly: ~ looks around weirdly and hen runs to the car to get outta there!!!!

And then she calls mom and dad: "Hi! I got my first speeding ticket!"

Mom: "haan mujhe bhi milti hain. par main 100 main hi bach jaati hun! congratulations on the graduation!"

Dad: "both mother and daughter get speeding tickets! ~sheesh! and yes.. congratulations by the way for the first one!"

Elder Sister: "wow!!!! you can drive that fast!!!"

~ kya family hai!

DayDreaming!

2009-05-21T03:55:00.003+05:30

Here's a song that came rushing back to me...

"Dreamin' I'm always dreamin'

Dreamin' love will be mine

Searchin' I'm always searchin'

Hopin' someday I'll find

Someone, someone to love me

Someone to need me but until then

Well I'll keep on dreamin'

Keep right on dreamin'

Dreamin' till my dreamin' comes true ue ue ue ue ue ue ue..."

back to the basics!

2009-05-16T10:50:00.003+05:30

and it's a beautiful, rain-filled yet sunshiny day! there's a barbeque planned... ;) and the marvellous laziness of a slow saturday fills her with peace!

she smiles as she stutters up out of bed and begins to marinade the chicken!

~ and then everyone needs to believe in something.. she believes she'll grab some beer! (food my friend can make u smile!) ;)

confined by words

2009-05-05T03:31:00.003+05:30

'purple ramblings' as it's most ardent fan calls this blog shut down to the world. The reactions have been myriad... (and she thinks that's the latest word she's developed a fancy for)...

i turn in now to talk to myself... i turn in now to find a few answers to questions i have always been shattered to be faced with. they are hard questions... the answers lie in giving it time and patience.. holding on and continuing to believe...

it's never easy it? especially if it becomes a tussle between the one's you love and who are closest to you... you don't want it to turn into a match... yet it gets weighed... your decisions are just that.. based on what you think is best for you and what you have been brought up to believe is best for you.. isn't that faith substantial enough?

maybe... a voice inside my head reverberates as i write.. maybe i am thinking too much.. maybe it's just a bout of insanity that needs to live and spiral out...

it's a maze of maybe's and i'm finding my way... (and i am still not ok to give confine the questions in the clear boundaries of words)

hiatus

2009-04-05T16:26:00.000+05:30

i know i will be back... it's just remains to be seen when! :) keep it rollin folks!

tidbits..

2009-03-28T17:49:00.002+05:30

It's a good feeling when all you have pending on a to-do list is to go to the bank and fight for a debit card! ;)

Yawn.. stretch.. lazy friday morning giving way to an easy time at work with a mere 2 client calls... a night with dinner of nice adrak wali dal... a movie... a few long conversations..!

A coffee shop.. a book... a humongously satisfying chicken salad and a humongous glass of chilled cold coffee to keep it company! Such is the massage to the soul!

A cute li'l kid deciding to crawl all the way up to and stare up with his big blue eyes and go.. 'aaaa' and then you get on the floor too and its a crawlathon with folks looking on weirdly amused!

A maruti service station guy who falls for ur smile and does your repairs on priority and for free... ;)

A gas station guy who insists you participate in a lucky draw! And lo and behold you win a pen! (hey something's better than nothing.. and since I already have the jonga you think i care about the SX4 in the bumper prize? ,';o) )

2 beautiful golden labs sniffing their way up to you and deciding to settle down and play with you!

A dholki that you bought off the roadside and love to create ruckus with! A night with the dholki, a 2 string guitar, drumsticks only and lots of food and banter!

Orange juice as a famished you stands on the street getting chappals repaired and buying pirated dvd's!

~ and a count of days to meet the special people in your life! (oh yes.. and a clean clean cupboard! ... complete ain't it!) ;)

Saddi Jonga!

2009-03-14T13:15:00.004+05:30

and oh well.. it's time for a formal introduction to saddi jonga! :)

This rugged li'l baby was driven from Baroda to Bangalore and Independence Day found her trundling along to Chennai for an Independence Jam and then to Tada falls for a night camp! 6 people, 1 Jonga and enough camping equipment for 12 people! Quite an inception eh? ;) This baby stepped into areas where even a safari wud've cringed!

Since then she's been on various trips! And she's enjoyed every bit of them! This is one jongs who got her break drum changed within 4000 kms! And got a new tyre within 7000! :D (hey don;t stare! she's tough!!) Kabhi bas ek lambi drive.. kabhi airport ka ek geda... kabhi biryani ki khoj.. kabhi camping and trekking! She's already been there done that!!

And then came the day when she got her shiny new stickers! Character had been added to the already existing attitude! If she likes you she'll literally drive like makkhan.. but if she takes the tiniest offence at the way you handle her... she will have her revenge! (as she did recently with Barwala who kept screaming this damn car is too smooth... so our li'l darling goes 'ha! now try putting me in gear!' :D The time he had was terror-ible!)

Like Mish often says... ye gaadi.. itna pyar hai iske peechhe na... none of of us can see anything happen to it!

Sometimes if she's not getting enough attention she throws a flat tyre tantrum!! And to give you an idea of the 'luv' around for this one here's a recent conversation:

me: happpyyyyyy holi! :)

rathore: hey ... happppy holi to u as well

caution: keep Jonga covered

me: :D jonga aaj office jayegi ji

and 3rd flat tyre in 3 weeks!

rathore: opps..

me: kal raat me hua!

airport jaate jaate

hee hee

rathore: Jonga ..ek trip ke liye jidd kar rahi hai

me: so to lag raha hai

me: :) chaliye ab hum egg masla banaate hain aur office ko jaate hai

baaki ki baatein wahan se

tyre bhi theek karana hai!

rathore: ok ...

bye

Jonga pe thoda red gulal laga dena

me: :) ji

bilkul

jonga apne horn se aapko happy holi kehti hai

rathore: ok ...main bhi jhappi leni ki koshis karta houn
and so... gaddi chaldi.. chhalaanga maardi! :)

clouds!

2009-02-20T12:14:00.004+05:30

And the status messages of friends read:

Mini: Life is beautiful! :-)

Ammu: happppyyyy

Shweta: Dreaming my life away...

And then this plays in my head over and over and over:

Talking of status messages here's one on the list that'll make your day!!!!

Nishu: pee needs to be aimed .. not potty .. potty is atom bomb .. drop it anywhere .. it detonates everything :)

Of Mondays!

2009-02-17T01:56:00.003+05:30

Ahh a b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l Monday! :) (and no I am not drunk right now!! there is not even a drop of alcohol in me and hasn't been for the past 36 hours now... so no I am not even hungover!!)

Ok so it was a slow start with me turning off the alarm for the n'th time and then suddenly realizing that 'Oh Shit! My maid is on chutti!!' (that directly means I am suppossed to listen to my alarm and not wait for the doorbell! ;) ) It was 10:05 and I had a meeting at 11!! And I somehow insisted on having a bath and on breakfast as well! The feat was managed in 25 minutes flat and as I ran down the stairs it struck me "I had a flat tyre last night! I need to get the hawa checked!!!" Lo n behold this is the day that there's line for Hawa and not Petrol! Call up boss, "I had a flat tyre (conveniently skip the last night part)... I will be half hour late!" :D

Languidly walk into office to discover that 5 people have been waiting on you for a meeting to start! Now doesn't that feel 'important'! :D (yeah yeah.. Cheap thrills!) 1 meeting.. 2 meeting.. (stop wondering where's the good part!) and then I rush out of office to enjoy a nice subway and get the tyre done at the Ceat Shoppe closeby. (Yup.. paranoid about driving without a stepney!) Now to cut a long story short, I need to buy a new tyre! But what the heck.. here's the long story as well... ;) When the 'new' car was coming from Baroda to namma Bengaluru then dad had had a flat tyre which was quite bad and so it already had a patch in it. This tyre was designated to be used as a stepney. However when I had a tyre wobbling problem (a few months ago!!) the stupid maruti guy changed tyres without telling me. And so I had been driving on the patch wala tyre. Hence now the need for a new tyre. Added to that is the fact that its a JK tyre and the dealer is only on JC road!! (I take heart that since I will finally be there I'll get my car stickers done as well!)

And I still insist that it's a beautiful bright sunshiny Monday and I am NOT under the influence of alcohol!! Go ahead... read on!

In conversation with a friend sometime later in the evening...

mightyrudh: and you know on the best part of the trip! i was riding with jeet (yup... the darkling of my life! Amd yup MightyRudh is male!)

I copy paste this piece to Granpa who is also on GTalk..

Granpa (out of his sheer love and possessiveness for the man in my life!): kaun hai yeh dusht??

Ani: ~ question: does he use a female deo which has in it the pheromones to attract men?!!

Granpa: err.... hmm... aah...

Ani: :P

Granpa: in the larger interest of people involved in this complex situation, i choose not to react!

(ok disclaimer... the man in my life is not gay! it's just that he attracts a lot of men!! In a way... so long as its just men and guitars! ;) )

Meanwhile my roomie's status is reading: "Life is Beautiful" complete with a smiley!! So obviously my questions are:

1. Did you get another job?

2. Are you getting married?

3. Did you hack a rich guy's bank account!! :D

In another window I have Mr. You. Know. Who getting romantic and I am rapidly blinking and staring at the screen when he finally types, "Motee fainted!" and I breathe a sigh of relief!!! (go ahead! blame me!) :P

Ahh well! Cut to a scene where I have managed to leave office before midnight and run off to bhai's place! Talk about being pampered it was like being spoilt to the core! Garma garam dosa's with special dosa chutney (compliments to Fazzy Bhaiya!!!)... crowning glory is a special egg dosa... accompaniments of aam ka murabba and mirchi ka achaar!!! (Ab koi thaka hara office se aaye aur garma garam ghar ka khana special parosa hua diya jaaye... to ye jannat se kam thode hi hai!) :)))) Idle banter and games on a newly acquired XBOX! Thodi der baad it was striking 12 and cinderella thought it was time to be home! Now it's a ritual that Bhai walks me to my safe haven and then I drive off! Is baar gaadi tak pahunchte pahunchte...

Ani: 'Pastry khaane chale?'

Bhai: 'kahan?? Leela's leke jayegi tu to!'

(don't look at me like I fell on this earth with a load of ancestral money to squander! The Leela's happens to have a nice li'l Barrista in it! ;) )

Ani: 'abhi to vohi khula hoga!'

Bhai: mmm.... hmmm....

Ani (on the phone with Fazzy Bhaiya by then): 'jaldi se aa jao.. ekdum abhi aao... ghar band karo aur aao'

Bhai: 'arrey kya kar rahi hai?? mera chashma toota hai.. maine topi bhi nahi pehni hai.. Leela's jaana hai! main aata hun!' (ahem! ahem!)

(by such time Fazzy bhaiya in a state of complete panic has arrived by the car in his lungi and is graciously told... chalo baitho.. Leela's chale!)

Ani: ~mischevious grin!

Fazzy bhaiya: 'arrey bas do minute lagenge kapde badalne me.. bas do min!'

The 2 men go off.. take 10 minutes instead of 2 and the transformation is evident! From lungi to mast shirt n torusers... from toota chasma to skull cap and casual sandals! Tashan!!

Ahh well! It's a night full of chocolate with choc excess, dark temptation and wicked brownies!!! Lots of conversation... some guitar strumming... and a nice drive back home with Bhai and then Fazzy bhai in the drivers seat trying to figure out a way to connect to my li'l Jonga's engine! :)

Now tell me.. isn't that a beautiful Monday!! :)))

(Its an ethereal experience to have a great Monday... I needed to narrate this in the first person! :D )

foodie weekend!

2009-02-09T01:18:00.004+05:30

she sleeps of too sunny side up eggs with butter toast and beer... wakes up to milk and strawberries... fixes a meal of lobiya and bhindi and fulke... takes the day through on cups of mint coffee.. and dozes of to bites of a roast almond chocolate! Morning finds her having a bath to end up at a lunch with buddies... a Mexican chicken burger, a milano pizza and a couple of pitchers of beer... evening finds her biting into the sheer joy of couple of raw red carrots as she makes corn bake for dinner! and now... a dash of whiskey over a glass of kokam to put her to sleep to face a very full Monday!

~have a great week ahead! and don't beat her up when she says 'stay hungry.. stay foolish!' ;)

wish her luck!

2009-01-10T09:20:00.002+05:30

ok people.. she's on her way home and she needs all the luck you all can summon for her! :) she's also inevitably looking forward to the gajar ka halwa and the various other MommyMade delicacies! :D

she will try to keep you 'posted'! ;)

the safai and the homecoming!

2008-12-29T23:37:00.005+05:30

Her Christmas started with a major "spring" cleaning operation in the middle of winter! The chaos around her was wanting to settle... she was wanting to bring in 'good karma'! And so she set about to do a major overhaul of her room! As Pinchester rightly put it "each time I come something drastic has happened here!!" :D

Her nooks and corners were cleaned off and it was a 'song sung blue' with a lot of the covers matching the flooring! (yes my home tweet om has blue flooring to resemble the ripples in a very blue pond!) Net Net.. she likes it all over again! The lots of tiny lamps all around make her find her peace...! :) She even hung a miniature wooden turtle coz she believes it brings good luck! Another friend (Mish) went on to say "ur room is like magic.. everywhere u sit there's sumthing to pick up and explore!"

~ she took a bow!

The marathon cleaning up had left her and Mish tired and hungry! That's when Granpa decides to turn up and we go eat a nice, satifying continental meal.. It was the types that leaves you nice n warm n sleepy! :) Needless to say.. she slept like a log!

The day after that found her lazing around "working from home"! (ahem! ahem! and revelling in her new found karmic goodness) ;) And then she scooted with Mish in the evening to gallavant and enjoy sum coffee!! The two of them have come to the conclusion that "boy! can they eat.. or CAN THEY EAT!" :D a 1200 bucks bill at a barrista is sumthing!

Now the saturday had promised to be tough! So she decided to sleep through most of it waking up only at 4 in the evening! A couple of missed calls.. one of which was "her sister's boss's sister!" ~ sheesh! and she was invited for Dinner! Now for obvious reasons she couldn't say no and ended up drawing upon "ALL" of her social skills by buying flowers and spending 3 hours smiling and laughing politely at a conversation that shes terror-ible at having!!! (~phew!)

She made a couple of urgent phone calls to vent it all out and gain back her sanity and ran off to Mish's place! After a long rant about the evening and venting venting venting they drove off to the airport! Sadda Vadda Praa was coming back from Videsh! And he was so not expecting us to be at the airport at 1:30 in the night!! :D A beautiful drive and a cup of coffee later, the flight had landed and we were on our checkposts eyeing the door and every every every person coming out of it! Any cute firang was duly admired and gawked at but then we realized we needed to focus! :D To not take any risks one of us posted at the cab counters and the other eyeing the exit like a hawk! Intermittent calls "any luck?" "not yet" "ok bye"! :D And finally.. after 1 hour 15 mins of the flight having landed walks out Bhaaaaaaaiiiiiiieeeee with his hair curled as ever and the distinctive goofy smile on his face! Shell shocked to see us! Eventually the surprise registered as he walked out! :D

Tanking up on gas for the drive: 200 bucks!

The coffee while waiting: 150 bucks!

The look on Bhai's face when he saw us: Priceless!!!

:D :D :D

The night was spent chattering away and seeing photos and getting to know New York in so much detail that both Mish n me can walk down the streets and know exactly where we are in New York now! We probably even know what gullies to take to reach where!!! (FYI: The Chrysler building has white bulbs and the Empire State glows red and yellow!) :D

7 AM found the great Mish standing over our heads demanding to be dropped home since her maid was due to come! Ideal moment to catch some sleep! :) ~ she would wish! She was pleasantly surprised at 11 AM when Pinchester dropped by with sum beautifully wrapped truly yum plum cake! And then she decides to break on her the fact that "She's started cooking!!!!" (Now this is one babe who would not step into the kitchen to save her life even!!!) Thereon as hunger struck we got parathas packed, picked up some beer and gudangaram's (the vadda praa's first words during the welcome jhappi were "yayyy! I'm back in India jahan Gudangaram milti hai!") and headed to you guessed it.. Bhai's place! Bas fir kya tha.. full on matargashti! Thoda bahut sentiapaa also with Bhai going "chaahe jo bhi ho.. jitni bhi achchi scenery ho.. kitna bhi sundar ho.. vahan koi apna nahi tha... who do you share all of it with?" Biiiiig round of biiiiiiiiiiiiig super jumbo hugs! And he starts to sing "mere desh ki hawa! kahin kuch jale kahin kuch sade.. hai mere desh ki hawa!" :D

The evening found us cleaning Mish's Pad and saw a very tired bhai snoring away happily! He was slowly woken up as a feast of ande ki bhurji, dal makhani and phulka's arrived and was made to eat! Some playful banter later as they bade gnite they decided to eagerly wait for his one bag that had been left behind by the airlines in Frankfurt! (~that's the one with the chocolates in it!) :D

At 8 AM sharp an excited bhai calls... "Oyee!!! Mera bag aa gaya!!!" A very sleepy me goes "hunnnnnn... hum aa jayenge shaam ko office se!" :D And lo and behold as promised we are there.. gorging on the chocs, getting some new music and movies, seeing more photographs and eating Chinese!!

:) Welcome Home Bhai! I missed you!

the transformation!

2008-12-24T19:20:00.003+05:30

The workaholic is sitting in office and listening to songs as she types this post! :)

After months she's wearing a salwar kameez with dupatta full punju ishtyle and everyone stopped work to look up once and comment.. "what's with you?!" :) Her bachchas (aka testing team) decided they all want photos clicked with her in this "naya roop!" :D A brief conversation with boss also ends on the note "aaj vaise tumhe kya hua?" ;)

We crossed a major milestone yesterday and the mood is light and celeblatory! she plans to go out with friends for dinner on a weekday so it doesn't get better than this! It has been loooong!

And her 1 year old tiny lil prince of a bhanja has fallen in love with the Miss India World and decides to express it by letting go of his chocolate and picking up the femina cover with her pic on it and showering her with his lil baby kisses!!!

:D ~take the time out to be with yourself this long weekend and have a merry christmas!

chhoti si zindagi!

2008-12-21T06:08:00.003+05:30

Tumultuous! and that's the only way to describe the way things have been! her life has pretty much been work driven as as you know who has gone on to say "apni life main testing ke alava kuch chhoda hai?" to which a very sheepish answer was "i need something to do now that you aren't here!" ;)

The kukkad makkhanwala (aka butter chicken) she made for her new found 'bachchas' was a superhit! Ok.. before you wonder more.. my bachchas are my testing team who work the way I do to achieve something we know is unachievable! But then.. "If at first you don't succeed call it version 1.0"! :D

Ok.. so she's had friends at her throat o give up work! she's listening.. she's taking a semi-break in jan! Mom's looking forward to her going home so much so that even before she could get up in the morning (or evening given her sleep cycle) dad had gone and booked them and sent her an email with the details! It's been quite sometime since she was back at "home". Things must have changed she's sure...

Dada aka Barman aka the guy who she insists is wasted and so should get married is in town and so is the crush of her life! It was idle banter and lots of laughter as a bunch of 8 people (one of which was a Sardar and the other a Sardarni) decided "zindagi bahut chhoti si hoti hai"! And that resulted in them gobbling up 2 chicken platters first and then eventually 35 parathas!

So the scene at the Delhi Dhaba went like this:

"ji paintees (35) paranthe.. 15 aaloo, 10 gobi, 10 mooli"

stares her down and then "makkhan ya dahi?"

"ji dono"

another stare.. "kaake pack kar jaldi..!" one more stare.. "paintee paranthe!"

(take a guess at who the Sardarni was..! and as the Barman put it.. 'an evening with Sardar and Sardarni!') ;)

Meanwhile a kitten has decided to jump up into the car through the window and in between shouts and screams the li'l thing for its surprised life is shooed out! (and she wonders.. how such things happen to her! whoever heard of a cat climbing into a car through an open window!)

and now she sits waiting for the sun to stream in through her windows so that she can get some sleep! (yep... jilted body cycle! or is it the parathas??! 3 hajmolas down!) :D

this and that.. here and there!

2008-12-09T18:13:00.005+05:30

Ok.. so while the parties have been battling it out at the elections and celebrating their "victories" while completely ignoring their combined failure very recently, an Indian court has asked for Google Earth to be banned! Apparently this was a tool in the hands of the terrorists that enabled the planning for 26/11 and so it should be "banned". How convenient! (to ban the tool and not the abusers of that tool!!) Perfect I say. At the same time ISRO is looking to create a "Google Earth Like" tool.

So while we keep our blinders on and continue to not learn, Pakistan also treats India like a piece of shit and says no to handing us our most wanted. The siege in Mumbai lasted a few days... the siege of the nation shows no easy end!

On a lighter note.. I have to be in office at 10 AM tomorrow! Now I did that once last week and I spent the day in a sleepy trance accomplisihing no work whatsoever. On any normal day I open my eyes to the morning sun not before 1030! And to reach office at 10 means....! oh well! The weekend was fun where we travelled 400kms (round trip) just to have some biryani! I'm cooking butter chicken tomorrow morning for my testing team (and making it to office at 10 am! please pray for a miracle!) and I need to buy a birthday present tomorrow! I have a room whose dirt and chaos is slowly wrecking havoc inside me and I pretty much know what the coming weekend is like! ;) I'm dying to make me some spaghetti bolognaise and some mushroom and sausage pasta and am also waiting for January to happen! I also met the cutest dog yesterday who decided to guard my car all night for me!

The someone special in my life has been giving me several moments to hold close and he made me watch "office space"! A must watch for every traffic jam plagued cubicle dweller and I think I'm happy being motee hereby giving up all (whatever lil existed anyways!) attempts to lose weight!

~ Celebrate the weekday! Have some vanilla twist with coke! Cheers!

but it rained...

2008-12-02T12:03:00.006+05:30

She tried... she tried to detach herself yet in vain. The last straw was when she read this:

Indian agencies knew that the attack would come from the sea, and by mid-November they knew that the Taj hotel would be targeted. And yet the attacks still happened. A blow-by-blow account of how the plan to attack Mumbai by sea was hatched and executed.

The Article is here: Mumbai Attacks Piecing together the story.

It's an impotent political system "leading" us! Leading us to a future of constant fear, of insecurity! The Mumbai blasts have laid bare wantonness of the skeleton we call the "leadership of the nation". And they have the audacity to belittle the attack! A world looks on in with mixed feelings of pity and mockery as the affected pick up strands and move on with their lives.

Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru had said: "The children of a nation are a trust of the nation. What the future will be depends on how we discharge our trust". The only trust being discharged here is that of laxity, corruption and a weak-shaking-at-the-knees-save-your-backside-stance.

Lives have been lost.. the tears haven't stopped.. and "they" manage to smile and move on..

(have the lessons been learnt??)

Leaving you with this:

Wrapped in a polythene tucked away safe in my mind

A little goodbye maybe or just a passing smile

The birds fly away to the southern sky searching a home

A bunch of paper flowers or a little boy left all alone

Can somebody hear me I'm screaming from so far away

Morning who will calm you now, the evening is eclipsed again

Well does life get any better

More yesterday than today

How I thought the sun would shine tomorrow

But it rained . . .

They justified the cause for which Daddy might give up his life

It's been so long, so long a time, still I miss Daddy at night

The ache is long gone but the never keeps staring along

The waters in the seas are high

and all the sand castles have drowned

Well does life get any better

More yesterday than today

How I thought the sun would shine tomorrow

But it rained . . .

sometimes..

2008-11-28T19:28:00.003+05:30

"Not all who wander are lost!"

Been wandering... inside my head and outside my soul too! The hiatus is thus explained. Adding to it has been a stress injury to the right arm so been taking it easy as well!

kehte hain kabhi kabhi lafz nahi milte aur bas aankhen hi sab kuch bayaan kar deti hain... samajhiye ki is nacheez ke saath kuch aisa hi hua... the so called "work-life" balance had become extremely skewed (goes without saying in which direction) and a search for 'peace' is what she had embarked on. Well... lets just say when the people who matter most are there to support you, daanto you, pamper you and get you to figure your priorities... it's not a difficult battle at all. It's just that it's with yourself and your convoluted head has to learn to let go...!

Add to that sprinklings of mini getaways, thele wala chinese, kadak adrak wali chai and a bewda bar and it's all the more easier! ;)

aur fir in aankhon ki badmaashi aur muskurahat kab tak kho sakti hai?!

welcoming me back!! :)

venting

2008-10-07T01:49:00.004+05:30

warning: true and complete ramble ahead!

she was wondering at the crimes against secularism... at how we wait for things to reach that last dangling bit and then take action... at how we call ourselves a free country when people are not free to follow their own religion... when Maharastra is only for the 'marathi manush'... when Kashmir which is the 'crown of India' (??) is in a state of unrest... when we publish 2 reports against the same man and vindicate him of a heinous crime... and of how we are not willing to give equal status to the men who don't bat an eyelid when it comes to their country... (the 6th pay commission)! how we are willing to hamper progress (the nano project)... and through this all, all that's important is the nuclear deal? important enough that the media writes about the different pens that will be used at the 'signing ceremony' ??

we write and we forget! i guess i will too.. i have just vented.. how long do you think this will irritate me?

~ and then it rained... she drove a while into the wild rain as various thoughts (some like those above.. some of more selfish origins) circled and settled... her inner whirlpool is eventually slowing down... it's a slow process.. she begins to look within and without... she quietens down.. slows her pace... takes a deep breath and wonders... wonders how even she reached the brink and had to let something called 'tendinitis' happen to her to slow down...

why? why don't we find an equilibrium that won't oscillate so near to the tipping point?

(why can;t she play the drums again?) And why have why's always been so futile?!

she figures she needs some more rain... she figures the silence needs to hold her as its own now...

Karmic Rain!

2008-09-29T13:29:00.002+05:30

The world has turned topsy turvy and life has gone from chaotic to crazy mad and yo yo driven! The aura's have started to feel wavy and jarred as well! It's looking like another weekend needed soon for her to run off and find her peace!

- working hours: 10 am to 4 am

- working weekends

- a project that is so red that its impossible to salvage? (sheer destruction! :) ) yet a try! (thus the working hours!)

- a car that is now brown and not black (for want of a wash and want of time given the work hours!) I figure now is about the tim it needs a sticker which goes "Do not wash! Undergoing Scientific Dirt Test"

- a maid that's disappeared for 4 days now! (a home that's undergoing a dirt test as well!)

- newspaper that has not come since the day the guy took the bill.

- electricity going off only at her place to be discovered at 2 AM coz that's the time she enters home! a night at a friend's and then running to the BESCOM on a working Sunday! It's a loose wire on the pole itself!

- talking work in her sleep!

- weird dreams! v e r r y y weird dreams!

- an ant attack!

- an empty fridge... :'(

- loss of a debit card (now successfully blocked)

- a car accident in between as well

She's alive! and it's time to go Hari Om! And she knows she needs it to rain now! (when it rains all of the chaos begins to settle.. its pretty much like the dust bits flying around and then rain on them settles em to the ground!) ~peace!

adieu...

2008-09-05T12:29:00.007+05:30

A trip to Asia's Largest Monolith - Savandurga... a trek through the jungle to its top... being minusculed by nature's magnanimity...

Playful banter... packup in progress... birthdays... 'gifts'... hidden tears in the night...

78mm is shifting base to Saddi Dilli! It's been a tumultuous 4 months of having them around and being around them! The trip to Savandurga was the grand announcement of the next big step and thereon they were packed up! Saddi Gaddi managed to hold 7 people in it!! And here's a conversation that testifies:

Sanju: :D amazing the way that small little thing can hold so many ppl

Ani: :D aint it!!! it held 1 more on the way back to their apartment

Sanju: i counted at least 6 ppl coming outta of it

Ani: jeet got into the dikki! yup 6 is rite... and then there were 7!

Sanju: rotfl! its like first a couple got out...then a few.....and THEN A FEW MORE

Ani: ~grins!

Sanju: i ws like ~eyes popping out~

Ani: hee hee hee hee hee! :D coffeee?

The gaddi thereon managed to hold 12 bags and 1 table and dropped the adventurers to the station as they embarked on the next journey awaiting their dreams!

~ she had no idea she would miss them (and him) so much already...! All the Bestest adventurers! Yours truly continues to hold fort here! ,':o)

The Happenings! :D

2008-08-22T03:12:00.004+05:30

Lots has happened in her tiny lil world and she's barely had the time to let you all know!

It started with the parental visit! Her whole so to say tabbar landed up in namma Bengaluru! Alongwith it came her new car! A Car that in 10 days has had it's 1st service and done 3300 kms! :D

The parental visit came with more than the usual 'stress' of shaadi kar le syndrome! They almost found out about lucifer and it was tough to reclaim the situation! ~ close shave! It was followed by buy a bed syndrome.. to which the reaction in the end was a high pitched "NA BED CHAHIYE NA LADKA!!!" Shocked faces.. stunned silence...! Om.. ;) Respite was close at hand with the cutest most adorable bhanja ever! That smile and that naughty glint can win a gazillion hearts already!!

Next up was the morning of 15th August through to the wee hours of the 17th... It was a reunion of the college Band brahmaz Mistake and a trip into the wild with 78mm.

It was a tumultuous week with all its trials and tribulations... with all its fun and jubilation..! It was the one moment that she can ideally describe as "Om Ashanti Ashanti"! :)

Inspired!

2008-08-02T01:22:00.006+05:30

This really inspired her... and she's been reading and re-reading it for days now! So she shares it with you: "Some Thoughts on the Real World by One Who Glimpsed It and Fled!"

And as for the rest of her doing a disappearing act... she can be found "walking in the wild" out here these days! :) All in all, life's been eventful, she's found reasons's to celebrate with the one's she cares for and work's been keeping her tied up. She will write again soon... give her scattered brain time to settle down a wee lil bit! :)

A toast... to the happy couple!

2008-07-13T20:32:00.004+05:30

And so she managed to get most of her to-do list in order and head to Raipur for the grand grand grand ceremony of 'Bhankur weds Yediii' :D

It started with a chaotic moment with her making it JIT to the station to catch her train from namma bengaluru to aamchi mumbai! The train journey.. hmm... interesting than most! Her jinx of the 'budhhe snoring uncle' was semi broken since he was accompanied by a 'jovial buddhi aunty' as well! :) And to say that she has done it all is an understatement! A kid (cute lukin one!) setting out to do an MBA was also part of the accompaniers and the 'single-serving' friends made for a happy, interesting conversation at least upto Pune! Beyond that is when she caught some sleeeeep!!! :D

Hail Kurla station.. the usual Bhasad and the search for a charging point as she waits for di to pick her up! Her super cute (understatement) bhanja and di manage to make it through mumbai traffic (such that there has never been in the city ever) and we camp out in Andheri at the Shoppers while waiting for it to be time for the next train to take her to Raipur! Well.. Mr. Cool Dude Bhanja was the centre of attention and we had a happy time! Time to get into the gaddi with the 'driver sahab' driving her back to Kurla station! TRAFFFICCC!!! accidents.. red lights.. traffic jams such that the driver sahab who has ben driving in mumbai for quite a few years now has never ever seen! Well.. 8:15 (20 odd mins before the train leaves aamchi mumbai - and the train starts from here!)and all they have moved is probably several inches in that life threatening jam! SOS call to Shekhar aka Mommy.. check for next morning flight tickets to Raipur.. budget 5k! Mommy is stunned but nevertheless is a sweetheart and does the needful. 8:40 (5 mins after scheduled time) - 'Driver sahab.. maan lijiye ki bilkul traffic na ho.. tab hum kitni duur hain?' A smile and a half later the reply she gets is 'tab bhi 15 mins to lagega!' She meekly says.. 'gaadi ghuma lijiye.. ghar chalte hain!' ~ And thus goes the story of how she missed her train!! Calls went to and fro to let the groom in waiting know of the disaster and he can only bellow into the phone! It takes some convincing and pacification as she explains she's still coming but now by flight! Reach di's place.. book flight tickets... leave wallet lying around! (now this is a detail that you will refer back to sooooon!) and then settle down with Jeeju for an evening of exotic drinks! (lets not get into the details here... she doesnt want you guys to know the tankers that they can be!) ;)

The night finds them tullee, having patkoed all weird harkatein and dozed off.. the morning finds her hungover and just going through the motions of daily life to catch her flight! (~hopefully!) Breakfast doesnt go in at all... water also goes in in piddly drops! And then she heads back to the gaddi with the driver sahab all hopeful of them catching the flight! Well.. little did he know the jinx that she can be and soon came to the conclusion that the TJ's he's been seeing since the other day are all her doing! :D ~ grins and takes a bow! Run lola Run through Teminal 1 A without showing ID proof and barely get thru the security check when they announce boarding... but she needs coffee... Run to the coffee shop and scream 1 cappuccino only to scream..'cancel the order.. cancel the order!' Why u ask?! Why??!! Read this carefully.. "She has forgotten her wallet at home!" (home which is at least 2 hours away... and has a mere 10 bucks in her pocket!) and now go back to..'booked tickets and left wallet lying around!' :D So yet again.. "Bhankurrrr.... u have to have to have to pick me up from the airport!!!" And by now he can break his head somewhere! ;)

A first person account:
Well.. lets just say I finally made it!! For some odd reason he took me via the picchwaade ka raasta! And then I was introduced to the family! :) Chacha's and chahchi's, Bua's, Masi, all the Sisters and all the Brothers! :) We took time opening up.. but once there I was family for them! And it felt sincerely amazingly warm!! From pestering me to dance.. to khilaoing the bachcha's khana... to actually dancing with me! :) I had the bestest time with my extended family!

From endless trips to the parlor to get the bride looking stunningly beautiful... (with the first trip i guess I became the bridesmaid! and in the bride's words... her stress buster!) So I was one of the groom's bestest buddies and the bridesmaid rolled into one! Ever rushed a bride up to the waiting room after she's all dressed up and then rushed back to dance in the baraat and then rushed back up to escort her to the stage to be with her knight in shining armour?! (I had the driver puzzled... I had the bride's mom wondering where I am.. I had the groom's mom wondering ye barat me kyon nahi hai?! and I had the bride telling me 'go ani go' and the groom calling me up 'tu kahan hai?!') I guess i figured out the reason for the pichhwaade ka raasta.. Each time the bride would dress up, the groom would have instructions to be at the back door.. all the lady cared about was..'will he like me like this? am i lokkin good enough for him?' and each time..he wud thaamo his dil and fall in love with her all over again!! (umm.. each time = 3 times = for the engagemnt, wedding and reception!) :D

And then:
As the ceremonies drew to a close she somehow was being looked for by both the groom's and the bride' family's for various things... :) She loved it! She was happy that she was around the bride's mom when the vidaai happened... (it's amazing how bride's find it in themselves to cry buckets! :D and it's even more amazing how the knight in shining armour stood by waiting for her to stop crying.. wanting to do just about anything to make it easier for her! :) The luv just sort of surrounded you!) She was happy to be a part of the families and of the wedding! She knows this is a moment she will treasure in her heart.. Maybe these relationships were silent... maybe she won't keep in touch... but the thread in her heart will stay! Forever.. !

And then again... Groom's mom as a parting note: 'Apni shaadi pe humko bulaogi na?!' She: 'Jab kabhi bhi karungi to pakka!' :D

तो इस महफिल का हम हिस्सा हुए... ये महफिल शाम बनकर कहीं खो सी जायेगी.. पर इसके नगमे.. इसके नगमो से हम हर शाम थोड़ा मुस्कुरालेंगे! :)

Helllllpppp!!!

2008-06-27T02:33:00.002+05:30

do not look at the clock!! yes this was posted at a completely insane hour... and what if she told you she just took a break from work?!!

ahem! work has gotten hectic... it's totally Heck(ed) and Tick(ing) like a time bomb with the craziest deadlines/timelines/timezones!!!

her to do list has gone from and A4 sheet to a rolled parchment... and her her shopping list complements it too!! the only way she anticipates all of it will ever happen is if she makes it public property... so here goes:
1. get duplicate copy of telephone bill (the smart babe that she is, she submits the original for reimbursements... and now she needs one for her car loan!! Sam: Wagon R Duo! ;) ) and also carry all docs to Office!!
2. book tickets to the play on Sunday.. 330 show. Talk to Granpa, Nity and Ruchi before doing it!
3. meet up with Aba and KD for purposes which cannot be disclosed on this blog since the purpose is a surprise for someone who generally lands up here! (and no... its not a threesome! sheesh!!)
4. find out cost of something and report to folks sitting in the US to take a decision. (kinda related to 3)
5. eat head for the ultimate plan (related to 3 and 4... i know im getting too elusive here!! just eat my head with the numbers ok. and 3, 4 and 5 need to happen over the weekend at any cost!!!)
6. buy blue paint.. a painting stands incomplete for want of it.
7. buy earrings, a decent lip color (or if everything fails pick up one from di;s cupboard at the stopover in mumbai.. :D )... for a wedding!! (i'm terrible at buying the jangly stuff!!!!)
8. get something for this Bhanja of mine! :))) the problem is to be able to choose what!
9. bhidao head for what to get for the Bhanja's dad as well!!!
10. get the travel charger for the ipod!
11. read through a 250 page document and figure out EVERY word of it!
12. get something for Jaanemann! (and Jaanemann is my girlfriend.. go figure!)
13. follow the work wali to do to the last lil bit!!
14. tell the gym instructor u wont make it till 10th of the July!!!
15. get hair color done.. and get rid of all the other things that come along with being a woman that she needs to get rid of!
16. take print outs of the tickets
17. breathe - eat - drink lotsa water
18. book gas so that it comes by the time im back in town!
19. go to blossoms and find good stuff to do timepass in the train with.
20. transfer all perishables to mishtha's fridge!
21. pack
22. work work and then some more work!
23. learn to wear bengali sari.

so kindly do the needful and bug the life out of me!!!!!!!!

home....

2008-06-23T18:55:00.004+05:30

and in a tough spot of your life you turn to mom and dad.. no matter what the differences.. no matter what the shaadi k naatak... you just know that u need dad's hugs and mom's parathas!

Dialling Dad: Hi Doll! How are you?
Me: :) good (hiding everything...). u sound busy..
Dad: yaa.. i'll call back sweetheart?
Me: sure. luv u Dad. bye!

Dialling Mom: Hi! I see a lot of patients lining up.. I'll call back?
Me: :) cool.

Dialling Di: Hiii!! I'm verry busy right now.. I'll call u?
Me: kya hai ye? mumma busy, papa busy, aap bhi busy!
Di: ~laughs! bye!
Me: bye!

First one to call back Mom: Hi doll! kya chal raha hai?!
Me: :) work from home!
Mom: long day yesterday...
Me: yuppp.... (without going into the details!)
~ general chit chat about how things are.. about the car I'm planning to buy... all of that...
Mom: kuch khaya? (she never really asks me that... i guess she figures somehow that I'm not really ok and have been eating junk food)
Me: ~sheepishly.. maggi, bread jam... doodh bhi piya!
Mom: eat sumthin green.. make urself a nice dinner ok!
Me: ~ missing her bad! yup.. will. bye take care!

Next up Di calls and in the background I hear the happy sounds of my 8 months old Nephew!!!! :)) Makes my day always!
Di: so wassup?
Me: PMS-ing!!!
Di: oh no!!!
Me: ho hum!
Di: howz Jeet? (Jeet is Mr Knight in shining armour or as probably he would prefer it... demon in blood curdling darkness!)
Me: lets not even talk about the men in my life and their withdrawal symptoms!!!
Di: shit! all snapping at each other?!
Me: worse!
and my darling Pinky Singh urf Shauya Veer lets out another few happy screams!! :)
General chit chat again about work et al..
Di: u have to come for my bachchu's bday!
Me: 5th Nov! u bet i'm there! see he gets a guitar on his 2nd bday.. what shud he get on his first??
Di: Mom's givin him a cycle!
Me: Drum set! :D
Di: Thanks! (as sarcastically as possible!)
Both: :D laughing!!!!

Mom calls again... by now I'm sure she's figured I need her...
Mom: Medical rep jus gave me tea tree face wipes!
Me: :) smilin as much as I can... those are goood!
Mom: :) Im keepin them for u!
Me: :) cool!
Mom: eat sumthing ok? (100% she knows!)
Me: yup... luv u!

Dad's call came waiting while talkin to Mom...
I call back: Hiii!
Dad: :) Hi!! kaisi hai? (he's always overjoyed to hear me!)
Me: mast hoon...
Dad: u got the invoice right?
Me: yup.. will find out about the loan and stuff tomorrow
Dad: yaa.. once u send me the draft it takes me 3 weeks to process it!
Me: hmmm... so car by august looks like?
Dad: yup.. plan it like that! so u'll book my return flight tickets right? (and grinning!)
Me: :D yuppp.. once u come here we shall seee!!! since I;m the one who's booking them! (dead give away.... now he also knows!)
Dad: mera bachcha! bed liya? (standing argument between us... i likethe mattress on the floor.. no i want you to have a bed... coffee toffee coffee)
Me: car le rahi hoon... bed ved k paise nahi hain!
Dad: i have 3 complaints.. na bed liya.. na apni foto bheji aur na ladka pasand kiya!!
Me: Dad buying a car now! no money for the bed! I'm not fotogenic and I'm buying a car now! I dont need a ladka!!!
Dad: Anshuuuuu!!!! ur mom married me and not a car!!!
Me: ~both laughing now! You and mom were different dad!
Dad: Anshuuu!!!!!
Me: ~still grinning.. bye dad!!!!!

sometimes it just gets lonely... u miss the banter... u miss hurling pillows at each other... following mom around the house just to talk to her... pataoing dad to make you "omlette bread chips"... fighting with di for chindi things like 'u'll wear my tshirt and make it loose!'... sometimes... u just miss them... jus so so much!

and presenting to you ladies and gentlemen... the dude who can make any damn one smile! Pinky Singh urf Shaurya Veer:

oh rhymes and nick names!

2008-06-20T16:36:00.002+05:30

Ani: yellos! :)
nut~who: yello yellow...dirty fellow ...
hehehe
Ani: blue blue polish my shoe!
nut~who: red red ???
Ani: susu in the bed! :D
and green green kachrateen!
nut~who: lolz...well i really dint think of susu...hehehehe
Ani: :D hee hee
nut~who: pink pink ???
Ani: u stink!
nut~who: hahaha...i knew it was coming....and now when did u sniff ??
Ani: :D i not a dog mister!
nut~who: ok...let it be...lemme not get inot all that...
kaise hain aap ???
Ani: :D mast ekdum
aap sunao
ki haal chaal?
vohi haddi n vohi khaal?
nut~who: haan...thodi charbi aa gayee hain in dino ...
Ani: :D fat man and robin?
how much more prosperity do u wanna prove to the world?
nut~who: lolz...
laziness...and not prosperity...anyways my doc is happy...bcoz she says i am underwt and shud put on another 7 more kgs...hehehe
Ani: hmm... 'she'.. interesting!!!
nut~who: haha...how predicatable...n cliched...aneesha gulati...
Ani: somethings dont change now do they! this is one of those!!!
n wow!! its been ages since someone used my full name!!!!
its gone down to motee / ani
aneesha is slowly becoming too long for the office folks as well!
nut~who: why moti ??
Ani: oh that's like a "proper noun" as a friend says..
i may lose how much ever weight i want but i will ALWAYS be MOTEE!
nut~who: moti as in pearl ??
Ani: and its motEE and not moti the dog ok?!!
nut~who: lolz
Ani: ~ now if u put it as a pearl.. :D
hmm...!
but nah! stil motEE!!
nut~who: see ...u read me wrong.....aneesha...:-((
Ani: ~ sheesh! stop using my full name! its freaking me out man!
n i luv u old man!
nut~who: ani sounds more like an angrez poodle...(Ani cringes at that one and lets it pass knowing that its a futile argument with the old man!)
so wot do u want...ani, moti, motee...aneesha ?
or gudiya?
Ani: watever happened to 'gudiya' ??
:D u read my mind!
nut~who: i try read ur mind...but kya kare...i run out of words...hehehehe
Ani: wow!! itna golmaal hai??!!!! (and then i know of people who call me 'epitome of complexity!')
nut~who: naah not complex...its jus that one really cant read blank pages...jus stare at them...hehhehe...kora kagaz
hehehehe
Ani: aaj subah se main hi mili kya??!!! :'(
nut~who: haan yaar...coming to think of it...i have been kinda busy since morning...got up on the wrong side on my bed...and my bed is along the wall...then was late to work...rushed to a stupid presentation with the bankers...after that some interviews...EOD reached the gym to realise i dint bring my shorts...reached home pissed , emptyed my gym bag to see my shorts neatly tucked at the bottm...hehehehehe...its been one hellava day...
Ani: :D hey! dont gimme competition in being jinxed ok?!!!
nut~who: its not jinx...mera bad luck hee kharab tha aaj ...
hehehe
Ani: ~ wicked grin!

In coversation with the quintessential Dada

2008-06-17T00:53:00.003+05:30

Ani: ram ram! :)

Dada: haan.. how u

Ani: kya kar rahe ho? apun mast

Dada: bas 8:30 ko call hai uska wait kar rah hoon(the travails of an IT industry employee with a US client.. work begins in the evening). Aaj promottion list nikla. chk kar rah tha!

Ani: :) sahiiiiiiiii! aap kahan pahunch gaya?

Dada: kahi nahi (the travails of a BA in the IT industry.. or should I borrow a phrase from a friend and say the travails of a 'general category male candidate working with the IT Industry')

Ani: :))) arrey aap tension kyon leta hai?!

Dada: maine aaj tak tension liya hai

Ani: ye to point hai. jis din aapko tension hoega us din to tsunami earthquake volcano sab saath me aayega

Dada: aur batao

listen

Ani: listenao

Dada: one of these weekneds make some plan for konkan coast i can come from pune overnight

Ani: apun 3rd to 10th raipur ja rela hai

Dada: july na

Ani: konkan coast is not a 2 day trip

Dada: abhi kuch plan banao

Ani: its 3 days minimum inclusive of travel time

Dada: arre ek jagah jao

yehi to problem hai

Ani: haan ek hi jagah eg: Karwar

Dada: see

select one nice place

udhar jao

dont go for sight seeing

bakwaas hai woh sab

ek chaadi daalo

aur beer lelo

beach pe soo jao

2 days

dont u see how these firngs spend time

in one place

thts the best holiday

click snaps

come back show it to friends

try n make them feel jealous

yehi hai apna holiday ka funda

need to change that

Ani: coming weekend to i am working anyways (so its not just the male candidates here now!).. next weekend ka kuch karte hain

Dada: abhi karna hi aaisa nahi

start thinking

something might happen

Ani: :) ji salute!

Dada: u bar mite me

ddt (a name that took away all the syllables!) will come from mumbai

Ani: jeet jagrit rathore shekhar

Dada: yes

see

now u r talking

Ani: anant sweekar nity ruchi

Dada: now u r shouting

Ani: :D hee hee hee

Dada: scream kaha gaya

Ani: abhi aur kaun?? baakii ka shaadi ho gaya hai

Dada: i now

shaadi ho gaya

Ani: :D hee hee

Dada: kaisa halat hoga unka

(n i im sooooo... dead after this!)

Chaos as it reigns

2008-06-16T22:51:00.000+05:30

An incomplete painting stares at her... an inspiration tends to grip...

An obsessive compulsive cooking disorder..... and a desperate attempt to lose some weight beckons!

Confusion abounds: Wagon R New vs 2nd Hand Jeep... vs even a cycle u know!!

Another tattoo she's been wishing for!

A wish list that extends from microwave safe baking dishes to plants she wants to grow!!!

Scattered, cluttered.... Grinning at her own mess!!

2008-06-06T02:23:00.006+05:30

stocked up fridge... canvases she can paint on... t-shirts she can mess with... wires... some cardboard... a swiss knife restored ;) .... a few crazy ideas in her head... a ladder she wants to get... a few pots to grow some stuff.. a lot of her willing to burst out and express itself in myriad ways...!

10 - Ode To Scooby...

Paheli... !

2008-05-23T16:31:00.003+05:30

Over the past few days this is what life has been like and the songs been a constant hum in the head! :)

Work's been crazy.. home's been a haven... friends have been the joy.. he has been the peace and there have been moments of quiescence.. :)

Escaped!

2008-05-15T01:53:00.008+05:30

And she ran away for the weekend to a tiny li'l place to find herself! She's come back refreshed and with a new lease on life...!

These pictures tell her story like words could probably never! : The Album

And the song in her head can be found here: Indian Ocean - Boll Weevil

I let my thoughts run amok.. I let the world stand and stare... I let my spirit flow free and passionate.. I do whatever comes to my whimsy... I wield a brush if that's where my peace is... I wield a pen and let the feelings flow... I even wield a knife and invent in the kitchen... and when my spirit dictates it.. I dance!

I don't feign my freedom... I am free!

Soulflower

2008-05-02T01:39:00.003+05:30

She wonders if you've wondered about the image of the soulflower on the blog...

Well... what does it means to her? It's an incomplete bud... it's surrounded by protrusions (thorns maybe?!) It's her soul... always searching... always feeling... sometimes ensconced... always free... sometimes silent... othertimes chaotic... sometimes dreaming... always observing... sometimes smiling... sometimes still..!

And this soulflower has become a part of her... it's a tattoo now! Loads o thanks to 'Russell', the person who did the tattoo! Russell's studio has an aura all it's own. located in a silent sleepy part of Bengaluru called Kamanahalli, the studio is a artfully placed a few steps from a coconut tree in the centre of the road! With a Tibetan shawl as a curtain and a wall with an angel fairy rising from the flames... it mesmerized you the minute you walk in! The walls are his 'guestbook' with scrawls from all happy customers! You don't have a choice.. you will be happy once you go to him!! A tattoo is yes not painless.. but definitely (agreeing with a wall scrawl here) less painful than getting eyebrow threaded! (n you have to be a girl or totally kinky to know that pain!) :D

A lighting engineer for the concerts like Whitney Houston's.. Russell turned to tattooing jus coz he was bored with life! Got himself a motor, and other tools and built himself a tattoo drill! Lo and behold! Has 15 tattoos of which several have been a self tattoo... and 1 is in progress... the description of the in progress.. 'a dragon... another dragon below it.. and castle in ruins... flames.. darkness...the entire landscape!' He knows his stuff so well that there's jus one word to describe him: "Brilliant!" (Thanks Russ! :) )

Here's the work of Art! :)

And Russell can be contacted at: 9845588748 :)

Well.. the thereafter found her helping the Barwala move and setup house! It's a lovely place on the rooftop and for theirs to use for barbecues, beer and Floyd nights! :) She figures she was too much help coz by the end of it the market at the new place and the landlord all thought she was his 'wife!' (a voice inside her went meep.. double meep... meep meep and more meep!!!) :D

Home tweet Home!

2008-04-25T09:34:00.002+05:30

And so she shifted! :D With her mushtandas in tow helpin her out with the stuff that they say is definitly more than what a family also needs! And has had her vadda praa complaining that ur house needs cupboards first and then anythin else!! Through the narrowest of stairs, her stuff was carried by the mushtandas who were the left huffing and puffing (literally...! :D) She knows she would go pretty darned insane without the jing-bang around! (ahem! yes she is insane... jus not pretty darned yet!) :D

Shifted into this tiny lil 1bhk (1 hk actually!) which is one of those extra rooms that you have on the roof ! :) The rest of the terrace is hers to call her own! She finds herself sitting at the door most evenings and jus looking up to the sky to find the moon peeping from behind the palm trees!

She wakes up each morning to sunlight filtering through the curtains... she knows she's slept well... she can laze around for hours on end! She can read, she can paint... she can explore, feel and create!

"Sittin' on my own
Chewin' on a bone
A thousand million
Miles from home
When Something hit me
Somewhere right between the eyes"

(it was Me!)

The week this week!

2008-04-15T23:45:00.002+05:30

And as they celebrated the Barwala's birthday with Scotch, Sutta and (no 3rd S now!) a Zippo it was a lovely day! :) It's been a roller coaster week and weekend.... with a Monday off where the week went none of them knew... and then the weekend was this huge party of sorts this time!! After the weekend most of them were sleep deprived!!!!!

She's moving house... biiig step in her life is the feeling! And the experience is teaching her lots with no mum and dad around to pamper her and put everything in place for her... from finding the place to packing this up to setting the new one up.... the fridge, the address transfers, the household stuff... the financials!!!! She knows she;s growing up! And some experience this is!

She figures that's why she's sleepless! All she can think of is the big move! :)

(This one's a ramble of what's going on in her life.... next post from new home probably!) :)

Luv ya all!

ethereal...!

2008-04-05T00:38:00.004+05:30

a bike ride! (on the beast of em all!)

a secluded beach!

the ocean floor

darkness

sand ripples

rocks

shells

a walk to remember!

mangroves

a moment... shhh!

sun tan

dreams (nightmares?!).. shared

dhaabe di chef! :D

a river dry

a dam still standing!

a village

meandering

wandering souls! ('a lost young petal wandering souls.. i see the dream you seek!')

hands

creating

dirt and grime

nature's own!

constipation?! :D

"she!"

connections...

nostalgia

music

apparitions

foooooo..d!

fuzzy

kebab and the haddi! :D

luchi aaloo

hideaways!

78mm

travelogues

stories

lives less ordinary

mumbai

taxi (aey hip hopper!) :D

girl talk

the 32nd floor

soul searching

the fire in his eyes!

rut

roll

slow

get to know! :)

pink... (pink floyd.. pinky singh and pink walls!)

her paintings on his walls...

random ramblings (as usual nay?!)

scribble

cafe universal

tulleho

tanker

fight club

notes to remember

a code of conduct

fallouts

a new freedom

sparkle in her eyes

song in her head

dance in her step

a big warm hug!

and then....

Picture perfect!

2008-03-17T14:36:00.004+05:30

:) Om Happiness Namah!

Friday night: Friends, playful banter, beer, laughter! :)

Extended Friday night: 2 hours sleep, a will to complete the painting.. :) mission successful!

Saturday: Girlliiieeee! :))) Mish n Motee! Soulmates bond!

Extended Saturday: Mommy, Mish, Motee! Johnny Gaddar... gupshup! :)

Sunday: The kitchen of heaven! Happy cooking! Happy eaters! :) A vintage furniture shop... visions of a dream home! Friends, coffee and music! :)

An exploration of sorts...

2008-03-09T00:31:00.003+05:30

And she finished reading Shantaram...

When she had picked it up for the first time it was the monsoons in Bangalore and she had started exploring this new city! She related to the book on most every page... her immediate reaction, 'i wish i had written this book!'

As she let the last pages of the book slip between her thoughts and fingers she realized that this was infact an extreme version of all our stories.. life takes us various ways... how we deal with them, how we get weak, how we come out strong, how we sail and how we float, how we dream and how we give up... how belief finds us.. how we change... how life encompasses us and how we find in it the answers to our various questions...!

She just has this to say, "I’ve never been so lost...so confused.... so ambitious.... so restless.... so volatile.... so weak.... so fat...so juvenile...so smug.... so full of joy.... so wanderlust.... so bewildered.... so detached...so lazy....so stoned........" - attributed to Motuu.

:) mood is yes pondering and thoughtful.. but anyways... work has changed a whole lot and dealing with it is taking its toll... meanwhile there's a painting waiting to be completed and a few incompletes also begging to have their way found..! plan to get around to those this week!

What was special was finding a new friend and getting closer to an old one... :) A walk together and a few crazy conversations... with her singing a range of songs from 'oasis' to 'aasamaan me... laakhon taare!'

Have a nice week people! :)

moksha?!

2008-02-23T14:39:00.003+05:30

She thinks she'll pick up her paintbrush again today... she's revamping her playlists and her cupboard's a mess!!!! She's feelin lazy as heck and refuses to even crawl out of bed... so she tugs at the curtain and lets the sunlight touch her face as she dozes back to sleep again...!

Afternoon sets to early evening and she makes herself a cup of creamy coffee... for after all.. "there are only two refuges from the miseries of life... coffee and music!" :)

:D saturday!

seashell stories!

2008-02-16T02:25:00.002+05:30

inspired

copy

profane

insane

dance

moonlight

pearl drop

drizzle

guitar strings & drum sticks

coffee??

waving to an airplane

shine on (no crazy diamonds here!)

talk

listen vs hear

mindless rant

bottled.. (water? emotions?)

'floppy' the duck

lilies

om shanti shanti

Karma..

2008-02-04T23:15:00.000+05:30

And then there are times when you just see into another person's eyes and you know the goodness... there are also those moments when you look into their eyes and the insides of you squirm and say..'shit i can't do this to you!'... it's all about that one feeling that gags you! (for the better or for the worse..) :)

You walk down the street and the innocent eyes of a li'l girl selling roses just does something to you and you end up buying a dozen from her! (Her name was Shanti... :) and she had the cutest most innocent smile she had ever seen! It made her smile... and the warmth still stays...) And it's this other li'l guy with a wilted rose in his hands goin..'please buy this one lil flower from me too.. please!' You just shrug your shoulders give him a smile and buy his rose...

And it's a lil nephew's photograph with a smile tat says, 'right at you!' The cute li'l kid is growin up soooo fast!

And it's this strange shaped huge coffee mug where you know the coffee gets cold by the time you're through with it... but it's strangely comforting! (it's what you always wanted!)

It's this painting that's the voice of your soul... it's this book that you've been reading in a cozy li'l corner of your room... it's the aaloo parathas you end up cooking for a hungry friend who then goes into a trance everytime he talks about them ;)... it's about your boyfriend saying to you what you always wanted to hear... it's just that right song playing on your system... and it's you dancing careless and free in confines of your room!

It's Karma.. and it's flights that your soul takes!

This blog is the flights that my soul takes... how long could I stay away..?! :)

(I dunno how frequent I'll be... But I will be here more often than not!... Yes.. it's also this coming back to life crazy feelin!) :)

She is now here!

2007-12-09T03:37:00.000+05:30

Figments of Fragmental Insanity! is where you will also find her now! :)

Curtains...

2007-10-28T10:17:00.000+05:30

159 posts... 5 drafts... And a big Thank you!

That's all folks!

Of sirens and P's!

2007-10-20T10:56:00.000+05:30

It's a nice peaceful Saturday Morning.. she has been lulled to sleep the night before by the tunes of 'His' beautiful girlfriend (his black beauty, his guitar!) :)

After a long day (long week actually) where she's perpetually been on the phone half wishin her ears were some kind of crazy phone attachments which would automatically produce from her voice box, 'Hi! How are you today?' and 'Have a nice day!' :D Well.. I digress... It's a nice peaceful saturday morning and she's happily lazing around when out of the blue this machine she calls her laptop starts giving out the siren of an ambulance! IT IS NOT FUNNY! I MEAN AN AMBULANCE SIREN FROM THE LAPTOP WHEN I SAY IT! It jolts her right up... once she figures out it's her laptop, she figures it's about to explode.. Her only thought.. 'damn! It's too close to the speakers! I dont want those blown up!' So she manages to somehow (just don't ask how) shut off the siren and slip back into dreamy land!

So much for dreamland! Ting Tong goes the damn doorbell! (Its too loud for its own good. It shall self destruct soon!)

She had just gotten back into bed after dealing with the previous ting tong! There it goes again, this time more insistently.. (Ting Ting Ta Tong Ting Tong!) Ohk Ohk I'm cmin!

After that dreamland is a faraway thought and she's writing this blog all bleary eyed wishing to doze off again! But sleep evades her and she decides to take up the letter 'P' bestowed upon her by Shraddha.

Well it goes like this:
INSTRUCTIONS:
- Comment and I'll give you a letter.
- You have to list 10 5 things you love that begin with that letter.
- Afterwards, post this in your journal.

It's a P here! (She's trying sanity to prevent this blog from being blocked due to objectionable content but she just cannot seem to think straight!) Trying Trying!

Potatoes - She has to have a stock of them in her house for all kinds of food emergencies! (Spoken like a true foodie she knows!) And then they are good for an emergency fix of weird looking eyes! :)

Piranha - Now this just came into her head! Talk about having a nutsy saturday! N she decided to do a googly on this one. This is what we have people:

small voraciously carnivorous freshwater fishes of South America that attack and destroy living

The piranhas or pirañas are a group of carnivorous freshwater fish living in South American rivers. In Venezuelan rivers they are called caribes. ...

"Piranha" (from the album I Am an Elastic Firecracker) is possibly the most widely played, and commerically successful, song by Dallas, Texas, rock band Tripping Daisy. "Piranha" was written by frontman Tim DeLaughter.

Piranha was a Jaws spoof directed by Joe Dante and produced by Roger Corman in 1978. Universal Studios tried to stop the film from being released (because of its satirizing of Universal's Jaws films), but Steven Spielberg saw the film in advance and liked it. ...

Piranha is the brand name of a carbonated energy drink developed by and manufactured for EAS throughout the world. Piranha comes in 250-252 mL cans (depending on country of origin) and comes in a variety of flavors including Fruit Punch, Lemon, Watermelon, Sour Apple and Orange Pineapple.

Piranha (1995) is a remake of the original 1978 horror movie Piranha. Directed by Scott P. Levy, it was met with little praise from critics. The film is also known by the name Roger Corman Presents Piranha.

Pink Pajamas! :))) Yeah yeah yeah! She could have just said Pajamas, why do they have to be pink? Somehow, sumwhere in the deep insides of quirky li'l her, pajamas just hafta to be Pink! :D

Pasta: :) She needs breakfast! All she can think of is food! Pasta happens to be a staple diet of sorts at this home away from home! Come from office, too tired, easy shmeasy Pasta in a jiffy! :)

That's four done. she tries hard to not make the last P about food! N it's not! :)
It's P for Pins! She's an ace at losing them!! Safety pins, board pins, paper pins, paper clips, she just loses them all! So when through the crazy powers vested in her, she manages to 'find' one instead of losing it it's a eureka moment of sorts!

:D So much for a P! Now she's gotta go pee!

last few days... :)

2007-10-15T15:43:00.000+05:30

Dream

Follow

Walk

Run

Dance :)

Drum

Clay

Melt

Cheese

Pots

Cycus

Shrubs

Blueberry cheese cake!

Yellow

Red

Puff of smoke

Cloud - white

Angel (of harlem?)

Phone

Old buddy

Work

Time

Food

Binge

Cook

Home

Cushions

Colors

Balcony

Wall

Shakes! (yup)

Airplane

Jitters

Rock

Peace

Soul

Float

Dream! :)

A warm aura!

2007-10-09T17:15:00.000+05:30

"थकी थकी सी शाम फिर जवान होने लगी
उजालों ने चुराए हैं रात के सब निशाँ अभी अभी
जिन्दगी उड़ रही बनके धुआं धुआं
कल मिले ना मिले क्या पता कल कहॉ
आ सवारूं तुझे के जीलूं मैं ये लम्हा!"

"हसरतें थीं किसी कि, किसी कि ना हो गयी
आसमान से उतरता शोर, चमक रह है पोर पोर"

Fragments from this song... sort of been playing in my head! :) As for the purpose - it's there nice and clear! Got a lot of answers... be happy.. be free.. follow your dreams... My Purpose Ladies and Gentlemen is 'To Jus Be Me!' - to be the crazy-nutheaded-hidimbic-female form who luvs to light up with a smile at the drop of a hat and to be able to spread some of that around!

Miss ya Mum n Dad!

2007-10-07T03:59:00.000+05:30

And it's a life that goes on all night!

Running... chasing... traveling... aimed at what??

Yes its a li'l too often now these days that I throw up the question of "purpose"!! And then I say to myself, 'let your purpose find you!'! But that's started to feel kinda hollow!

Then there's someone who said to me, 'thy sole purpose in life is to earn more beer money!' :D (now there is a point there!)

Ok.. you ask why all of this again today? Well.. chat with a friend... The beer money concept doesn't apply to him.. he's a teetotaler! So he's quite lost!

The one song that comes to mind when I think of this question is Brad Paisley's 'When you find yourself' from the soundtrack of the movie Cars! (also found a video of it with Spirit, Stallion of the Cimmaron!)

And this time round, I sort of see my purpose in a more human form... will not put it into words here yet 'coz am letting it float around me!

Given that... the Video from Spirit is more relevant here:

Yes.. its one of the few posts in the first person... I'm ok! Jus need Dad's big bear hug I guess! :) Mum Dad cmin on the 11th! ,':o)

Serenity of sorts!

2007-10-02T22:58:00.000+05:30

Well, lets keep the silence unexplained and move on with the LOTS that has happened! :))

It's a topsy turvy world and then she happens to it! Result: :D Try and imagine it! The week went by without much ado... her space in the kitchen has been reclaimed! Ahh... peace! It was under threat yet again this evening when flattie announced she wanted a cook! But through mutual discussion that decision has been shelved and peace reigns yet again! ~Relieved sigh! (even He was horrified at the idea... !)

The great Dinosaur lover aka Barwala has been thinking about them way too much off late and this DVD of movies (not dino ones) it so turns out happened to be Dino movies when they start playing it at home! Tortured, Grandpa turns to tell her about it and she has the laugh of her life!!

The great Barwala also managed to drag her n Granpa to a "Peace March" on a HOLIDAYY!!!! And then he's the one who ends up needing a smoke, a drink and a leak! (~after this it'll be my ghost posting!)

Yours truly gets herself a new phone and decides to jinx that as well... its charging and then it decides to switch off! Mercifully the 10 grand she spent on it had some effect and it came back to life again!!

She gets a bunch of orchids worth 1 whole grand delivered to someone! Looooo.....ong story here! But it was so whacked out, it needed a mention here! :D

She spends a lovely weekend cooking and then shopping with girlfriends!! :) Yes, nothing more needs to be said! Weekend-Girls-Shopping!! And the day comes to a beautiful close with a piping hot Cafe Mocha! (Not without leaving stinker feedback for CCD!!) :D ~the critic in a virgo always rejoices in such moments!

And she spends a nice afternoon thru evening lazy bumming! Lazybum Nirvana! :)

Yes... an adhoc post... thoughts have been flowing around... they shall come together soon and make more sense! :) Till then, she's yours to torment and tolerate!!

Silence..

2007-09-25T07:14:00.000+05:30

Unexplained....

On my mind... In my heart...

2007-09-22T04:32:00.000+05:30

The visuals:

A chaotic sky... tufts of grey clouds spread all over.. leading into each other, breaking, crashing! Dusk... Beyond... a clear blue sky.. peace! Perfection: entropy and placidity! a warm pink flush all over....

Huge waves rising and dancing to create an image like the Stonehenge having a war dance of sorts!

A purple moon.. flames engulfing it!

All the rest of it:

Silk Route - Boond...

Maula Mere Le Le M...

Indian Ocean - Eup...

:) So long! Till then... Shine on you crazy diamond!

?

2007-09-16T19:54:00.000+05:30

will i live?
will i die?
will my life be just a speck in the rye?

where will my soul go after the body disappears?
will it be in peace or will it still search?

is there a purpose?
is there a dream?
what is the dream?
where does it reach?

does it touch the sky?
does it change something in me?
does it bring me closer to where i want to be?

where do i want to be?
in my head or around the world?

how come the quiescence today?
wherez the noise that hides this litany?
litany? or a voice of the soul?

how high? how hollow?
how low? how steep?
will i surrender?

surrender to what?
haunted.... ??
madness... ??
chaotic optimism??

wishes tears smiles superficiality??
are we truly happy?

illusions? how many??
shattered...? now or later?

is life a maze a puzzle a dream?
am i human?
am i mean?
am i insane?
am i wild?
am i perturbed?
am i crying?

but then again... how does it matter?
(and therez not a single why!)

(left indented for a purpose... centre jus felt to artificial...!)

PS - the post on Barwala has an addendum attached! and pllllllleeeeeaaaassseeee go to his blog!!!!

Barwala!

2007-09-08T23:36:00.000+05:30

This one had to be for him!! :)

How much do they go back?! Frankly not much! She's known him since college... the sleepyhead with the doped look and carrying a hanky around (all crumpled and stuffed into some pocket some where! )... Why hanky u ask?! He invariably had a stuffed up nose... in moments when he would actually wake up in class, he would pull out his Hankaa! (too huge to be called Hanky) and then proceed to blow his innermost congestion's onto it and then recede back into dreamland! :D

His face turns the reddest when he bites into a green chilly inadvertently! He's absolutely fine with the red variety... but even an impotent green one can also bring tears to his eyes and make him red in the face while warranting the use of the Hankaa again! He'll then give u a cute sheepish smile which is capable enough of touching your heart and lighting up something inside! It is definitely the cutest smile in the whole wide world and she never tires of tellin him that!

The bottomless pit that she loves to cook for! :) He'll appreciate it verbally.. but to see him eat what you've cooked is reward! Then you really know by his expressions that he's really really liked it and there is no greater reward than seeing the whole meal polished off! It makes you want to cook!!!! :D

His one wish... to get talli once in his life! The bottomless pit funda applies here as well! :) He's a 'Well' of sorts! Gets happy but jus doesn't get drunk! He's taken care of her and made sure she's home safe n sound after they've partied! And yes... this the 'Barwala' whoz certified bewdi she is! :DD Smokes like a chimney too and then reminds her of him coz they smoke the same brand! :)

We've shared a few heartfelt moments in our friendship... he's bared his heart to her and she to him... he keeps her off caffeine like a hawk! And he treats her like this lil girl sometimes... :) She loves the attention and pampering!! :DD (And she's sure she's the only female who got him to tie a crepe bandage for her in office with 2 others wondering whats wrong with these two at 10 in the morning??!! Why do they want to tie a crepe bandage here n now?!) :D

She can bug him no end, trouble him and tease him and he'll show her tat smile of his! :) His latest rant is he needs to start exercising soon.... (she sighs!) how this character with each bone on his frame spelling "lazy" in bold capitals is gonna start doin tat is somethin she still cant fathom! He keeps sayin he needs to lose weight but then they'll either have beer, or eat out or she'll make pasta at home, or parathas for that matter and that'll be that!!! :D lolz!

He writes well... (actually the next statement that she' gonna make will she's sure bring that smile on is face and make him blush...), whatever he does he does really well! (it's jus the lazybones that get in the way a lot of times!) :D

This is the one guy who wore "Bata ke havai chappal" with formal clothes for feeling too lazy to hunt for the shoes first and then the socks and then tying em up!!!! :D

Friend, guide, person with fatherly aura, a guy without whom Bangalore and work would be difficult, a guy who keeps her sane by hearing her out every now and then,.... and if she's not talking then gets her a beer and says, 'ok now tell me!' :D Sanity keeper... and I have to mention this again... man with the cutest smile in the whole wide universe!!!!! :))))

(Ok stop scratching your head and wondering why a whole post dedicated to him... ! The lazybum sort of inspired her to write about him!) :D yeah i can see tat puzzled look now!

__________________________________________________________________

Addendum: Loads o additions here!

First of a link to Barwala's blog: Random ramblings is what he calls it!

He's also the crazy nut who can spend all day at home watching Dinosaur Documentaries and then tell us in lots of detail about them!!! (I'm sooooooooooo............ dead after he reads this!!)
He's an awful teacher when it comes to teaching you how to smoke for the first time! And yes he is capable of lighting up a smoke with the gas... but not directly.. (it spoils the flavor u see!!) :D
Ah yes! How this missed mention here is a matter of national interest! He's the one suttafied creature who can pick up a smoke lying on the beach... (drenched n soaked in ocean salts for how many days weeks months!.. walked on by people.. shitted on by wild creatures!) and smoking it halfway through only to be disappointed and exclaim, 'it's a bit too salty!' :-o

:D More posts will follow only if I'm allowed to be alive after this one!!! ;-)

Therez a baby lizard in her room right now and she's contemplating her first murder!!! She's shit scared... but she's contemplating it!! (Refer: Lizardventure!) And she's thinkin of the Barwala and his death defying hand on Mite's floaters to kill two humongous creepy spiders on our Pondicherry trip! ~sigh! saviours are never around when you need them!

Tagged!

2007-09-05T00:36:00.000+05:30

Here are the rules:
- Players, you must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of their middle name. If you don’t have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.
- When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post containing your own middle name game facts.
- At the end of your blog-post, you need to choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag.
- Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Ok - So Rajeev tagged me! Well timed tag.. was in the mood to update the blog, so u'll see 3 new posts! :D lolz!

Here goes:

Middle Name: That's a no brainer! It has to be JINXED!!!!

J - Lets start with the name itself! J for Jinxed! I'm as jinxed as can be... more so around technology! I have to touch it and it malfunctions!! It's kinda maddening, but yeah heartening to know that machines can't get the better of me! :D

I - Inches! Those on my waist! I need to lose those beery inches around my waist! :D

N - naughtyspark.blogspot.com! (need I say more here?!) :)

X - tough one! xylophone?!! Drums are closer to heart... like to play.. very amateurish, but like to nonetheless! Gimme a good drumbeat and the see the magic! It's an instant pick me up!!!

E - eggs! they are a staple diet now! what with barely managing to get ready in time to catch the office bus! Quick, easy and loads o variety!!! :D

D - nopes not the drums here! Dreams instead! The ones you see with your eyes open! :) I sort of thrive on my many myriad dreams.... it's a whole world out there that in it's magic and beckoning keeps your spirits lifted!:)

Hmm... who do I tag now?! picking people with the same alphabets is near impossible! So I'll pick the same number as the number of alphabets! :)

The 6 people I tag are:
- Barwala
- Shekhar
- Arpz
- Kaylee
- Sam
- Sangfroid

:))) Aneesha 'Jinxed' Gulati

Random Ramblings!

2007-09-04T23:29:00.000+05:30

We move steadily into the whirlpool of machines creating a jam on the streets and in the wires... Dehumanized yet? Some of us maybe... She? :0) ~Laughs! She's jinxed remember! The day the wrath of machines becomes greater than the suffering she can cause to 'em is when she'll let out a sigh and nod... Until then folks, the battle wages! They try and she smiles with a naughty glint in her eyes and says, 'bring it on!!!' :)
____________________________________________________________________

Stormy lies a heart.. virtual dreams... wrecked by a tempest... quaked by the sea... Disillusioned? Nay! relenting maybe! To each his own and to each his sin... sin, crime, felony, bondage; It craves its freedom! An undying death... a vision unclear... a wish unfulfilled... the path - lucid! And the eyes - crystal!!

Sunday bloody sunday!

2007-08-19T13:03:00.000+05:30

It's a beautiful sunshiny day.... she's had a good 8 hours of sleep when her twiddly eyes open and she's thirsty! In that moment she figures that the maid'll cme in abt an hour so she dips in clothes that she needs washed and cozily snuggles back into bed just for the heck of lazing around!

So much for lazing around!!!! The maid doesn't turn up... there's no water in the house! (Thankfully she finished her morning ablutions during the first wakey wakey!.... Thank God fer small mercies!) And yes... there will be no water in the house till tomorrow afternoon! (Stop laughing!!)

She goes down with loads of empty buckets.... roomies fight with secretary... there's mercifully one tap downstairs which has water.... stand in line and fill up the buckets and trudge back with them up to the third floor!

Her cellphone decides to act funny and starts switching on and off of its own accord! And the lights decide to start flickering as well!

Her laptop has gone into hibernation so the music stops playin.....

She cancels the dinner she was hosting tonite... all bartans (bole to vessels) are dirty and there's no maid and there's no water!!!

Her cooker has also lost it's safety valve... (but thats a whole other story!)

:D Jinxed right? And herein are linked all the other posts where havoc has been wreaked on her:
- Jinxed!
- A lil more jinxed! (the penultimate paragraph!)
- Some more jinxes!

:D Cheers people! And it's exactly 1:25 pm! The day's only just begun!!!!!

Float... :)

2007-08-18T15:20:00.000+05:30

It's a crazy mixed up world you know! And then you go find your peace in some crazy corner and can actually hear the muzik! :)

The past few days have been eventful! She met 'his' elder brother and they hit off amazingly well! It was an instant connection of sorts... But these two as diametrically opposite as siblings can be! Only the way they talk is the same, the rest of it is soooooooooooooooooooo...................... different, so different that the minute he settled down, she n Mite rushed into the kitchen n stared at each other with shocked expressions!!!

Yes.. it was amazing meeting up with him! :) The afternoon that we spent is detailed here!

What else you ask? The to-do got complete... works gettin done, she's goin over to meet him next weekend so she's counting days now! :) Still got an exam filled week ahead!

But the crux of whatever she's rambling in this post is that there are a gazillion things on her mind right now, another gazillion that she needs to get done probably... but she's unperturbed! she's learning to float... she falters off n on... but hey! It's fun! Head up, smile on her face, twinkle in her eyes and she knows that it'll all happen in its own time! One by one, bit by bit, lil by lil she's relinquishing control... she's letting herself breathe... chaos is crazy, but crazy is fun! :)

Chaos!

2007-08-14T11:55:00.000+05:30

Here's a conversation between Bar and her... Read on!

faith child... thy spirits shall lift in a lil wile!

hail and sleet and torrid rain, as distant as they,
the road to haze seems longer than a mile

a mile nay... a swift glide
where u ask me... answers i have none...
serendipity child... thy moment shall come

the dusky blue is distant, wings i have none,
crawl to the oasis i must or fall on my knees and die

free yourself from the entrapment of your mortal frame
let your soul engulf you at this moment in time
wings are but an extension of your freedom
reach out child... the way is not dark tonight...

mortality is but a metphor for the entrapped soul,
bound by laws from a universe lost,
what hope have we when we worship order,
when thy heartbeat's song is chaos

peace in our chaos is what we find
the soul swirls on like a whirlpool divine
worship not order... but the entropy around
dream not of white yatchs but of stormy skies
the world isnt perfect... and so aint u n me...

farsaken finds itself, the song of the universe,
at peace we were never meant to be,
think not of it as an intrusion but the way symbiots of eternity,
were always meant to be

meant to be... meant to be... but what will we really be?
will we sing a rainsong? will we dance?
will eternity fall down at our feet?
will my turmoil find rest in this universe?
will my song set me free?

seek not freedom for none can bind u,
despair not turmoil for it is not that troubles u,
look not for meaning for there is none,
the universe is randomly chaotic,
that's why existing is fun!!

Life...

2007-08-13T12:27:00.000+05:30

It's kinda uncanny the turns that life can take... Infact does take! A minute you're here, stuck in the vicious eruptions of daily life and seconds later the dormant volcano decides to engulf your life! You are thrown over jagged corners that you never thought you'll explore... or even need to.. you're fighting for sanity... to save some smithereens of yourself and as your world crashes and burns you find yourself a molten corner to hibernate...

And in the showers that follow every explosion the cold becomes a reflection of your soul... in the depth of this winter you find in yourself an invincible summer!

:)

A smile...!

2007-08-09T15:23:00.000+05:30

It's amazing how people you've never known before and will never know after can touch your lives! It's been happening to her way too much off late.... and it's left her with a strange yet warm feeling!

While walking down the road in search of the State bank of Mysore to get the stamp paper for her rent agreement she happened to ask a passer-by for directions! It so happens that another somebody was asking for directions to the same place... she being the chatterbox that she is, they got talking and he sent left her with words that still resonate, 'it's so easy to meet someone sometimes...!' (the unsaid was clear to... and yet so difficult to know someone even though it'll be a lifetime together!) His name was Javed!

Then she came across Paul the other day... after a lot of standing around and waiting and getting refused by an n number of autos during peak traffic hours to go home from office, she finally found a rick! Paul just walked by and asked can he come in too... he was going to the same place! I nodded consent and then again we got talking! He's a localite and tried to empathize with my situation... :) And he paid the whole auto fare inspite of me protesting loudly and vehemently enough! He even paid for beyond his get off point so that I wouldn't have to pay up later! How gentlemanly is that! (And its sooooo... rare these days!)

Then she met a rick guy who while dropping her off to someplace had a flat tyre... he wasn't sure of the route so he asked her how far... she gave him the exacts and he said he'll still drop her! En route they got talking and it turns out he had a cycle shop which was suffering losses so he closed it down and bought a rick from his own savings! And a rickshaw costs a good 70 grands people! He leaves home at 7 and reaches back at 12! (and we complain about a 9 hour work day!) He hates leaving so early in the morning... no not 'coz he wants to sleep in, but coz he loves his wife so so much that he doesn't feel like going away from her for a single moment! It was heart warming and she forgot herself in his story for at least sometime! :)

A series of myriad events like these makes you believe in humanity!

On that note... what makes you smile? :)

(I still need remiders on my to-do!)

Save me!

2007-08-07T16:06:00.000+05:30

Hellos people! I know uniformed hiatus! I wish I knew! :)

It so happens that the jinx continues and the laptop that the company had entrusted me with a mere month ago has already crashed twice! Once twas the software n this time twas the hardware and as luck would have it the part had to come from Singapore so it took till yesterday to find it's way into my hands again! Bless me! :D

The landlord says your rent is due... ! The bugger calls up on a sunday evening and sniffles... 'rent de do!' Monday it was duly given to him and the bugger that he is he says you pay maintenance on your own... ek cheque extra nahi drop kar sakta namaakool usi bank k usi dabbe me jahan apne ghar ka cheque daalega!

The nightmares have still been haunting her but here's something about chaos that she read and it really looks like its helping. :) This guy by the way has started writing lil lil bits that keep getting messaged to me and it's a pleasure reading them! Thought twisting they are! :) The bestest thing here is that she's found a friend in him... in this crazy metro called Bengaluru she's finally found a ear that hears her and knows she needs to be heard! He's been amazing.... and he keeps me off coffee like a leech curls at the pinch of salt!

Wat else shall you ask? Office has shifted... my nomadic existence continues though! I conveniently plonk myself on anybody's seat who has decided not to turn up for the day! :D After a completely jobless last week (no laptop u see) this week has it's training session as an e-learning! So in between all those jargon's and short forms that are breaking up my grey cells into alphabet soup I'm writing this post! No wonder it looks so uninspiring right?! :D

The weekend was nice.. I finally got to spend some time at home and dear darling Mini had come over all the way from Hyderabad! So we had a ball of a time! It was a very female bonding type of weekend... chatty, crazy women all over namma Bangalore first and then raising a storm at home! And yours truly cooked for them! This is the first time she tried her hands at gulab jamuns and baby they turned out well! :) It was a delight to see everything finished in a matter of minutes!

There's a to do list that I keep pasting everywhere and then forgetting where I placed it... and I have this horrible habit of pressing the 'show desktop' button instead of the minimize one so the post it on the comp hasn't been a big help either. So now here's my to-do and all of you have to take my case to complete it:

1. Curtain repair
2. Curtain rod repair! (desperately need a drilling machine!)
3. Apply for leave! (yes i need a reminder for that too!)
4. Once leave gets approved book tickets! (:D guess where i'm off too?!)
5. Register AmEx on the net
6. Coax dad into giving his account number! (i need to transfer money into his account and he's not giving me the number! If that doesn't work in 3 days ask mom!)
7. Buy Martini glasses for dad
8. Buy a nice Mysore chiffon sari for mom
9. Buy Swiss knife for jeeju
10. Think what to buy for sis from first salary! (need ideas here people.. help!!)
11. Give laundry to the laundry guy toms and get more clothes washed from the maid! (this is urgent!!)
12. Manage to study! (I need constant reminders that I have an exam on monday! haanji.. naukri me bhi egg-jam!!!) yeah foodie lil me! :P
13. Make a planner (i haven't been able to find a yearly wall planner so i need to make one! For that you need to remind me to buy chart paper as well!)
14. Carry all documents to get my flight tickets and transportation charges reimbursed!! Else I loose out on 11 grands! (yup u need to remind me of that as well!! :P)
15. Call up bhai and ask him for the 2IC's number (that's a person and not a memory chip) and then ask him for the canteen depot's number and then find out about how much will a fridge cost. (yeah yeah yeah... don't wonder about this one! jus remind me)
16. Ask bhai hi current address and clarify if he receives a courier or only speed post manages to find him so as to send his rakhi! (he's in the Indian Army! Don't look so stunned!)

I know I'm hopeless!! Hellllll.................ppp!!!!!!!! (And yes the reminder is in the I... so I'm desperate!)

____________________________________________________________________

To all the lovely souls who took out time to save me... :) Biiiiiiiii.......g hug! you guys rock! My to do is complete!!!!!! And a special hug to Shraddha for sending me reminder mails everyday!!!! :)

Majaa ni life!

2007-07-30T10:53:00.000+05:30

Ah! The joys of a whirlwind weekend! I've heard so many people complaining ki 'weekend pe kay karenge?!'..... that I feel truly blessed to have mine spinning away! (For the want of a quiet peaceful hibernating day at home!) :D

It started with Di's birthday so what followed was a grand party at the ITC Windsor Manor! Details here. (Yep... this is my new blog! :) )

It unfurled into a lazy saturday morning at home with Mama n Mami! Chai and gupshup... family time! :) It's always nice to have family around you! Especially when you're far away from home! As is obvious shaadi ki baatein to honi hi thi! So there began the debate with Mama Mami sayin 2 years and Di n Me sayn 5 years before I get married!!! :D I mean 5 bhi mere hisaab se jaldi hi hai! Don't sigh! (yeah I can hear all of you!! :P) I mean c'mon people.. I've just started work.. there needs to be a phase in my life where I am well settled and enjoying my independence... that's when I will be in a position to logically think about shaadi rite?! :)

The entire day was a nice lazy lull with loads of idle chatter... :) Sunday morning heralded her with a flutter somewhere on the insides as she went down to meet a few friends of her significant other! Now he wasn't here but his friends were... and so we met! Anybody seen 'Meet the Parents' ?? :D In the end we had a nice time in each other's company even though there were certain awkward moments of silence... (naturally na.. we were meeting for the first time and he wasn't even there!! takes time people!) It gave a nice fuzzy feeling on the insides to be able to meet up with the people that form his world! :) It's rare to see such friendships where each cares about the other so-so much! It was beautiful!

:) The evening found Bar and Mite pacifying her flutters with Beer again.... first at Le Rock where the Kingfisher Rock Fest was happening...! Bands playing were Pantella and Synapse... twas more shor than muzik so they quickly covered their cover charges and darted out across to Pecos where they found their chairs and lost themselves into the music, the popcorn and the beer!

Ah!! majaa ni life! :)

Hungry Kya?! :)

2007-07-24T12:07:00.000+05:30

What is it about the freedom that you have now? You waited for this moment all your life, but what are you doing with it? You have all the time in the world to 'explore, dream, discover' and the truth of your stark freedom hots you in the face saying you don't even have a dream.... Your eyes turn to huge pools of darkness as they turn inward to search your soul... you finally confront your loneliness and let out a smirk at your own self.... Eventually after a mental cloudburst your distant dreams float back to you and you wonder at that annoying thing called a 'purpose in life'...

She finally has an answer.... 'Your purpose is your dream... if only you care enough to look beyond the thunder and lightning of an unkempt today..!'

And she quotes here an sms that a friend sent to her long time back: "Throw off the bow lines, sail away from the harbour, catch the trade winds in your sails... Explore, Dream, Discover!"

:) Go ahead... wonder at the change! This time all credit to Barwala... she narrated her catastrophic thursday and friday to him which included a laptop crashing, data being lost, a certification exam link going wonky, inedible food in the cafeteria and of course the inexplicable loss of appetite.... even her cellphone started to act funny! His very basic solution to the chaos engulfing her and her moods at that moment was. 'Lets go out! I think you need Beer!' :D I shall not reveal how much I drank... I shall only say that was high and not talli... my appetite had come back full force and we feasted on some amazing food at Peko's and by the end of the evening The Barwala himself after looking at her capacity went onto comment, 'I am proud of you!' (Now that's a certification she's proud to have!)

Coming to certifications she finally managed to score a 100% in the exam.... :D (Dream on.. I shall never let the secret out here!) and she also got the title of 'Champaklal Certified Cool Dudette!' :D Ohk Ohk... I shall give a brief explanation of that... Abhay is a colleague who joined with us.. in one of the plays that we bakraas were made to perform he played the part of a very harassed Champaklal doing the rounds of Namma Bengaluru in an auto and trying to find hi way around in the initial days! he's turned into a good buddy now and the name Champaklal happens to have stuck with him like a leech to a human leg! :D

Well, the dudette managed to drag Barwala to watch "Five point Someone" (the play) while it was raining cats and dogs in this city... :D His constant wish was for us to miss the play... and he even managed to ask the auto guy for a match to light his smoke to avoid shivering in the cold Bangalore rain... the rick guy decided to dutifully stop at a nukkad and buy him a box of matches inspite of the fact that we were terribly late and the traffic jam was worse than a nightmare! And yes she blames him completely for being late... :D (she'll get whacked for it!) And yes he did go onto say that, 'Any play with vodka, grass and pink floyd in it has to be good!' :) Not to mention the babes he got to see!

Since her appetite was back with a bang sunday found them at a nice 'West Indian Cafe' called 'Sues Kitchen' where they made sure they ate more than the 250 bucks of the buffet was worth! The food was damn good and the dessert was a marble cake reeking in rum! Need I say more?! :D

The evening found her cooking for a bunch of friends... On the Menu:
1. Chicken kaali mirch
2. Pasta-a-la-Pateela! (she's a lil short on the big utensils that she ends up needing when she has to cook for 7-10 people! So the Pasta found it's place in an aluminium Pateela and thus the name... :D Twas actually corn cheese tomato pasta!)
3. Garlic Bread
4. Goes without saying... Beer!

The chef was duly complimented with discussions of Harry potter happening! With 5 females making a racket that's expected poor Bar and Bade Bhaiya were quite scared to even step foot in the house... but they eventually got coaxed into the noisy muddle and it was a nice fun evening!

A walk down the lane near her home-tweet-home with a big smile on her face and her ipod in her ears made a zillion people look at her and wonder, 'Damn! What has this woman been upto?!" She gave 'em all an even bigger grin and went onto tackle the week head-on! :)

As a smile fades....

2007-07-20T17:37:00.000+05:30

A sunset sky ablaze with the torment of her heart... she sits in the corner huddled unto herself... Dreamz? She's started getting a lot of those that you're supposed to get in your sleep... It's more like nightmares though! For her to get dreams, let alone nightmares is rare... so this regular occurence and recurrence shakes her up a bit...

Sone pe suhaga factor: the loss of apetite! She's been living on a fruit bowl and a glass of juice plus lil bits of food that people force down her throat off n on! She knows she needs gooooo..d food to snap out of her state but the wish of it just isnt there... :( So till the foodie devil doesn't poke her with his tail she's got the wierdest expression on her face!!!

It looks like rain today.. large thunderous clouds and the violent sparks of brilliant lightning surround her...

PS: The jinx continues... her brand new laptop crashed n her system's been formatted now!!

Pondicherry Maadi!

2007-07-16T14:39:00.000+05:30

A day... a weekend... a sunrise... a sunset... and bliss therein!

After a chaotic, butt-damaging bus ride in the cabin with 13 people cramped in and yours truly and the other men in her life 'sitting' on the dashboard and the engine with Bar actually having to undergo the nightmare of watching the driver give them an 'n' number of near death misses in the wee hours of the morning they made it to 'Pondicherry...' where they decided to 'give time a break!' :)

Stop 1: The guest house... an ethereal experience! (pun intended :D) The first one to greet us was 'Le Dog'! Time to give details about Le Dog here:

Name: Eric
Nick Name: Le Dog
Initial Affinity: Ani n Mite
Initial Repulsions: Barwala.. (the dog just sort of smelt his backside and didn't take a fancy to him)
Later Affinity: Barwala after a bath! (yeah yeah... hard to imagine that the laziest lump she's ever come across was actually carrying an electric razor on vacation and managed to get up before her and have a bath... he was actually smelling fresh!) Looks like Le Dog also thought the same and then turned out to be a constant companion for Bar as long as we were in the premises of the guest house! :D

The guest house happened to be one of those old cottages with a thatched roof designed to keep the place cool... it worked well... maybe a li'l too well... When it rained it also rained leaves and twigs from the roof, not to mention gigantic spiders which Bar managed to reduce to smithereens with his bravado and Mite's floaters!! :D 1 such spider decided to creep on close to where we were all sitting and having a gup-session over a local bottle of wine... 'SpiderMan' leaps into action... well so does the gigantic spider and the whole room goes helter skelter as the spider decides to jump into unknown territory and disappear... lo and behold he is located in the loo where Spider Man steps in with his weapon aka the floater and murders it with an alternative weapon by sheer chance... his own two feet! :D

Stop 2: The Beach Cafe
On the menu: Prawn masala, Squid masala and veg biryani for the manager! Gud food... french babes with tamil guys that made the 'other men' repeat a VIP Frenchie ad... 'usme hai aisa kya jo mujhme nahiiiii.....!' :P

Stop 3: The bike rental after a long search up and down various roads for a kinetic to be available.... Come to think of it.. Le Kapoor was a saving grace! He was the only one who could ride a bike and Bar couldn't do the kinetic either! The photo id deposited happened to be a nirma i-card! :D (years gone by and still.... :) )

Stop 4: Le Club
A long search... some map reading... and some direction taking later we landed up at Le Cafe... (which there were too many of) and eventually made our way to Le Club. (Notice the fact that we've still not hit the beach). A nice sofa seat with soft cushions... a menu that cam calling at all our senses... and Dire Straits in the background (which eventually gave way to Himesh Reshammiya... but that's a different ball game altogether!) We chilled out in those premises with beautiful 'french babes' and the other men making eyes at them constantly as she sat there and giggled away over loads o cocktails and awwwwwwwwwsum food! The soul of the foodie was immensely satisfied and her heart was taken by the Mojito!

Quick Note: Angostura Bitters - Aromatic bitters made in Trinidad using orange peel and gentian as its main ingredients.

Loads o chit chat... how work has been treating everyone... how life has taken various turns for all of them... and how things are slowly (or faster in some cases) changing and maturity setting on! (yes maturity and not old age!! give us a break man!) :D Soon we were graced by the presence of 'The fairy Godma and her knight in shining armour... err.. a red t-shirt in this case!' aka Smriti and Amar! Loads o laughter... loads more chit chat and another 2 rounds of cocktails and/or beer as the connoisseur so desired...! :D 6 whole hours passed us by.... the afternoon sun shrouded by clouds gave way to a grey evening sky laden with rain and eventually to a breezy all encompassing darkness.... Bliss!

Needless to say they slept like babies!

Day break happened for her at least at 11:12 am with Mite's pointing his cellphone clock right into her face as she drowsily stretched to open one twiddly eye! :) Ultimatum: You have 20 mins! Her reaction: a laaaaazzzyyyy smile and she dozes of for another 2 mins! :D

The morning (or whatever was left of it) found them hunting for return tickets to avoid the nightmare of cabin seats!!! :D Well... Mission successful! :D

Next Stop: Satsanga.
Chill... they didn't suddenly turn religious... it's a nice french cafe again with loads o french babes! (esp one in particular who Bar seems to have lost his heart to!) By the way Bar insists that if we stay for a week in Pondicherry we can become a part of the french community quite easily and then their 'girl-woories' so to say will be over! :D As luck would have it, Bar's Kingfisher Lager started to taste like 'Le Beer'! (:D It tasted like a mix of Beer and wine... speculations went on to say that it was over fermented... which reminds me of another beer story that Amar had to tell...) Well... after that bottled Kingfisher was a strict no-no! We conveniently and gladly stuck with Fosters!! The food needless to say was awwwwwwwwwwww.............sum! And the afternoon b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l!

Coming to Amar's story: The man and his buddies decided to make a sand box with waves to come in and keep the beer chilled... after having lost all sense of time and tide (yup.. time and tide actually wait for no man) the bottles happened to be sunk under 2 feet of sand lost to the ocean.....

What followed was a photography session of a few historical landmarks and a video made under the direction of 'Le Kapoor' and The cinematography of 'Le Bar' with yours truly as 'Le Assistant'! :D

Finally.... finally... finally we hit the beach at 3 in the afternoon (would have gone the night before but we got warned that a murder had taken place 2 nights earlier so we decided to stick in to our rooms!) where Barwala took to the sea like a fish takes to water! And yours truly went on a shell collecting trip! Her favourite's were a white serrated shell and another one with shades of purple and orange showing her both sides of twilight! :) Ah... she almost missed the mention of 'french babes' here again.. but this time Bikini clad for bar to feast his eyes on for about 4 seconds after which we were told 'this is a private beach... please go to the other side!' :D lolz!!!

Well... after wallowing around in the sand and the sea and making a structure in sand that she likes to refer to as the 'sand pyramid' they trudged back, packed their bags and got ready to leave as 'Le Dog' jumped on them for one last time... Mutual consensus - the trip was incomplete without 'The Last Supper' and so we found ourselves plodding onto 'Le Club' yet again. En Route, 'Le Bar' decides that he is inappropriately dressed for the place in 'chindi shorts and a t-shirt with a whole in them' so he finds a khopcha and changes into something more 'appropriate' and doesn't leave the 'dressing khopcha' without spraying on some 'axe white' so as to attract the french babes! :D She n Mite are in splits of laughter by the end of it!

The second round at 'Le Club' gives them a feeling of instant deja-vu... same sofa again, same french family dining in front of them in the same clothes and the same muzik! :D A re of the mojito's and an assortment of food platters later Mite observes that, 'this has been one of our quietest meals'... each lost in his/her own space... dwindling their own glasses but humming the same music even though differently! As they say... 'each to his own!'

The only appropriate end to this post is one word: "Cheers!"

:)

Addendum: By all our standards, it was nice to be able to sweat and feel human again!! :D

Floating...

2007-07-11T18:06:00.000+05:30

The day's dun and as I lay back in the chair and look towards the ceiling, the intermittently blinking red light on the security cam catches more than my attention... it catches a piece of my memory where it reminds me of the Konkan Trip with buddies just after MBA.... as I look on a vivid image of the lighthouse on an island off Karwar comes into play and I can see myself standing in the waves... letting the wind play with my hair....

The words that come to mind are a Def Lepp song....

"All I want is everything
Am I asking too much?
All I want is everything
Like the feel of your touch
But all I have are yesterdays
Tomorrow never comes

Its hard to hold your head up
When youre kneeling down to pray
And the talking dooesnt come easy now
When the words get in the way
And if you could see whats going on
Behind these private eyes
The truth would look so easy now
But Im running out of lies

You think the shadow of doubt
Is hangin over my head
Its just an angel whose wings hide the sun"

Reality Check!

2007-07-10T13:10:00.000+05:30

Ok ok! I know! Long hiatus! But one thing just kept leading onto another and i've been losing out on "me time!" No other reasons and no other bahanas!!

I have had a lot of worried people pinging me n askin me about my status on Gtalk which reads "the violent sound of crashing waves!" :) Luv ya all. It's jus that you know life takes you in myriad directions and you end up wanting to explore every li'l nook and corner before you realize that you have time on your hands and you can let the experience happen at a nice leisurely pace. Letting the experience happen to me now..

The turmoil is essentially in my head... 'ye karna hai, vo karna hai, kab karna hai, kaise karna hai...' but u know that's not even it! It's all because I actually want to let go of everything and jus flow... n the confines of my material life are killing me! Its like, 'I want to break free!' My life is my theme song and my dreams are the lyrics! And i've not been humming the tune lately...

The main event: House Shifting!

The chaos: Humungous! :D
The packer arrived a day early, there was no one to recieve the stuff, my phone decided to stay out of coverage, mommy did all the running around, the gas connection needed a ration card, there was stuff to be bought and there wasn't any money, an account malfunction landed up a huge some of money being transferred into a suspense account, an inactivated salary account, lil broke me, wlaking walkin and loads of walking, a reliance customer care that says I need to pay an extra Rs 562!!!! (my bill was 2300 Indian Rupees!!!)

The intermittents that made it b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l:

- Mite's and Bar at home for dinner and yours truly cooked cheese tomato pasta, corn bake and chicken in brown sauce (which was specially dun up using a Jack Daniel's Barbecue Sauce!) :D And loads of booze.... The bestest company, good food and awwsum music.. loads o gupshup... guys freakin out at the sight of a place called 'home' so much so that 'Oh wow! The platform in the kitchen is so much cleaner than our rooms!!!!!' :D Mite found his throne on the platform in a corner of the kitchen from where he kept getting displaced regulary to grind nuts and grate cheese! :D

- Mommy's comin! Man would I have been hasseled and frazzeled without her!

- Regular phone calls from the 'Baba' to keep my sanity in place... :) He's too much of a gem to be true... and he's goin to hate readin this so I might as well call him a 'Beastheart'! :D

- Bonus: A nite out at the beach with her flatmates and Papa MITE in tow teaching them the fine art of making the best of a 'ladies night' where booze is free! :D (She then slept at 1 am and got up at 5 in the morning 'coz she had to go n recieve Mommy dearest at the station! The rest is for you to imagine...!) :D

- A sweet li'l housewarming... dinner by mom, room set by me, loads o frenz, flowers n cookies, lotsa friendly banter and conversations and a promise to be taken out for dinner next weekend!!! :D

And now I wonder if this is the stuff dreams are made of... As I am writing my peace decided to gradually trickle in and colleagues have notice a calm smile on my hormonally imbalanced expressionedly freaked out face! :)

The thought in my head: I'm so lucky to be surrounded by all the people in my life! It's been a crazy roller coaster where I'm still trying to figure out in which way to hold the handlebars so that I don't topple over... But it's an amazing ride with the wind in my hair and a rush in my heart and NOW... a smile around my soul!

And she wanders lonely as a cloud.... :)

The song in my head:

"I've always thought
that I would love to live by the sea
To travel the world alone
and live my life more simply
I have no idea what's happened to that dream
Cos there's really nothing left here to stop me

It's just a thought, only a thought

But if my life is for rent and I don't learn to buy
Well I deserve nothing more than I get
Cos nothing I have is truly mine"

(There's a reason this post is not about her but about me! :) )

She wonders lonely as a cloud... :)

2007-06-28T22:50:00.000+05:30

"In all my travels I have travelled more than I can remember and remember more than I have travelled!" - This quote displays on the TV screen as she begins to write this post and she can do nothing but smile.

The last few days have been... well... 'tumultuous!' As she was leaving Bhopal the cloudy skies of a heat torn city formed a bird of paradise with an angels wings! That's the sign she needed... it told her she'll soar! :) After a near paranoidal experience with the Indian Air Lines Ground Staff Strike holding up her luggage till 130 am she touched base at the 32nd floor of di's place and next morning soared into stormy rain laden skies as she headed for Bangalore!

13th June 9:00 am: her first taste of the city! Only right now there's someone to receive her at the airport and there's a chauffeur driven car with a driver who knows all the routes to avoid traffic! So through the by-lanes of her dreams she reaches 'Cox town' which gets pronounced as 'Cocks town' and then there are a lot of raised eyebrows by people who don't know the place! :D It's amazing how she's gotten used to the ink expressions she gets each time she answers the question, 'where are u staying?'!

Experience 1: A reliance number that refuses to change 'coz of a procedure that as somehow changed only in this city and nowhere across the country! It finally changed yesterday! (She can faint at the mere mention of the word ill right now!)

Experience 2: The autos! '1 n half madam!' is a refrain if she hears any more she'll start tearin her hair apart.... And that flows on to experience 3...

Experience 3: Hair fall! The number of people who have warned her for that one... and the mildest of shampoos is not a help! (any tips anyone???)

Experience 4: The induction program! All in all a gud experience... primarily 'coz of all the amazing and free food! :D

Experience 5: Office at last! Still on training.... :) But enjoyin the experience! Gud managers above me so loads to learn there!

Experience 6: Legends of Rock! :) A pub that serves good beer and plays rock! Jannat! Another place that serves a sizzler called a 'tequila chicken!' and yet so many other haunts with the most amazing 'North Indian' food! (The North Indian - South Indian divide is truly a classic in these parts)

Been getting used to the idea of wearing formals day in and day out and mastering the clumsy art of walking straight with a big bag and a laptop all hung on one shoulder with a cellphone in another hand and the ipod wires dangling around her neck along with the employee card! :D

She's found a place that she'll start calling her own from next week and no it's not in Cox Town! :P But it is in the National Games Village and so people now listen to the address and then look at her from top to bottom trying to figure out however in the world did this 'Motee' manage a ghar there??!! :P to all of 'em!

A 'blind date' with a guy her sister wanted her to meet (who by the way has the most amazing voice...) and loads o weekends with the 2 men in her life currently along with Bade Bhaiya and a few other friends later she thinks she's willing to taken on the city for all that it has to offer! She's found a tour guide n Nattu (check her orkut profile for details) and he indulges the foodie side of her oh so completely!!

Her thoughts have been clouded with, 'what's my purpose in life?' of late and that has had her aura turn purple and grey time n again! But then she read this (all credit to the Dream Catcher)

Quote Unquote these lines from the Dream Catcher's blog:

"The small, small ways being my prop
Taking a journey, on chimera’s top
Through whiskers of eyes, soaked in tepidity
To far, far very far for a wish
A wish of Eternity"

and then there was a message on her cellphone that said, 'Shayad ise hi kehte hain to find something you need to loose... Let the purpose find you!' :) And her aura's slowly been warming up since then as she sips on a glass of Raspberry Vodka, shifts a li'l on the bean bag and gazes on into the skies outside wondering what tomorrow may hold!

Emotions have been running wild as a slow storm dwells inside... A storm that will change something... and her intuition says 'for the better darling!' :) There's a patter of feet in her head and a cloudburst of unknown tomorrows...

Another day.. another way... Still tingling... Still exploring... Mysteries drenching her soul!

Kapeesh! (couldn't help writing it here...:D Shark tales!)

PS: Thanx for all the hausla afzaahi guys! u all rock!! :) cheers!

Gettin Bangalored!

2007-06-18T21:47:00.000+05:30

It's been in one word: "crazy!"

Induction program

work

distances

traffic snarls

apartment hunting begins!

office

HR lectures!!!!!

auto walas with a mind and a meter totally their own!

loads n loads o people to talk to and a damn phone still on roaming for want of reliance servers to be up and runin properly!

foood! (awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwsum!!!) [the foodie is livin it up completely with gud food n gud etceteras! ;-) )

Pray for me people!!!!! :D

Morning, Noon and Night!

2007-06-11T18:39:00.000+05:30

"Some people walk in the rain, others just get wet!"
- Roger Miller

And with this comes to mind what I heard on Seinfeld the other day... 'Ever noticed how we are crazy about getting close to the water... we can give anything for a vacation on a beach... to be near a waterfall etc etc... but whenever we are out walking on the streets and a drop of rain falls on our head we just stop short in our tracks and look up as if the sky was falling! We run inside.. 'Oh my gosh! I nearly got wet in the rain!' "

Well people, it was I guess the pre monsoons and me and Mumbai! Shades of grey fluttered over the sky as it mixed with hues of pink and purple from an evening sun... A starless night and some much wanted sleep... an insanely peaceful spirit! The morning found her raring to go... the cloud cover had turned to a mystic blue-grey with the sun streaming through in places making it look like the 'stairway to heaven!' Her heart was warm... anticipation showed through and she felt like a 14 year old discovering life! (13's too teenagerish! :D)

And yes.. it rained! And she walked in the rain... :) The visible mass of condensed water suspended in the atmosphere took up shapes and signs she gleefully tried to decipher and the other men in her life laughed at her constant giggles as they shared a garma garam 'bhutta'! :) The night was ablaze with fire from both her heart and the coals in the barbecue... Loads of idle chatter, chili vodkas and tequila shots were on a roll along with very succulent fish and chicken! Also a very very sinful cheese dip! The music - a myriad mix of all FM stations! The aftermath: a house that looks like it was struck by a storm! 5 people find their comfort corners and plonk off into dreamland with no will to wake up any earlier than proves to be most necessary!

Another day another way... an all of 4 months pregnant mommy waddling around the house for want of sleep!!! So they sit together and talk away till noon over aaloo parathas and orange juice! Generally catching up on each others life... Di somehow can always figure out when somethin's up with her and then eventually they sit down together and have a heart-to-heart! :) The next day finds di stuck in office and she's watchin 'Pirates of the Caribbean' and has fallen head over heels for Johnny Depp! She sneaks into home late in the night and tries to be as quiet as she possibly can with her 'vishalkaya' frame and insane habit of banging into things! Sone pe suhaga is a Swiss cow bell right on the door which merrily loves to announce the arrival of any and everyone at any and every possible hour!!! :P

Another day... Another night! And it finds her on the ledge of a huge french window at the 32nd floor (top floor) looking over city lights... a few stars shine through... a glass of good french wine... coldplay and u2 on her pod and her heart fills with a plethora of thoughts! 'He' races through her head... the past and future both flash by... the future of course is anticipatory and idyllic even... Her tarot cards reveal 'Patience child! u will eventually get what u want!' And she wonders, 'What do I really want?'

Her last day finds her out on the streets of the city where she luvs to be... she's already been to 'linking road' thrice (ah the unadulterated joys of a subway sandwich after a shopping filled day!) and is now headed south of town where she lets her spirit take wings and fly! This was one of the times 'she believed she could fly!' The eyes are a window to the soul... such had been proved more than once in the past few days and as she walked the streets and explored on she could only marvel at the dreams in each soul! In a city full of sights and sounds she lost herself as the wind blew her hair about and as his hands slowly touched her head and played with her hair she found she was beautiful!

As she hugged her goodbyes to both of 'em and got into the train her hands reached out for the phone and Shekhar finally decided to tell her why they couldn't meet!

She slept like a baby on the train... Its never happened before! (She thinks she knows why... refer back to the giant in the previous posts :D) She's been home for a few days now... Catching up with Mom.. Watching movies with her... driving her around town and up the wall! :D

The image that flashes time again through her head is that of a li'l boy riding his cycle on a divider which by some twist of the municipality is a lil more than a metre wide... She can'thelp but wander at the small joys of life and the li'l ways in which each makes place for them!

She leaves tomorrow on another journey of sorts to a city unexplored by her before... She begins work soon... it's given her a few butterflies in the stomach... :)

The anticipations of a wanderer....! (yes that does mean she'll be irregular on the blog for sometime!)

A note: A lot of special moments happened to her... She just smiles a soft, slow smile and now drifts off into dreamland!

found this on the www :)

Hiatus!

2007-05-31T01:55:00.000+05:30

Ok people... after living this day as if 2 whole days were somehow scrunched into one I'm off for a week! :)

I spend all of tomorrow travelling! ALL OF IT! I guess tats why twas a 2-in-1 sorta day! :D The Baba once said to me, 'It's like a whole day just gets wiped out of your life! It's one of the best ways to find your purpose in life!' Hmmm.... lets see where my travels take me!

I'm dead! :D

2007-05-29T01:22:00.000+05:30

Ohk... This starts with something that she will be murdered for putting on this blog!! Shekhar aka Mommy aka the Traveller and yours truly were playing hide n seek with the phone all day... (He was busy then she was occupied and then again n then again...!) Finally at 12:15 in the night they got talkin... The conversation ranged from light hearted banter to serious emotional issues to even a spiritual journey of sorts with the words, 'Motee main tujhe chappal uthaa k maarunga!!!!' also interspersed in between! :D At a particular point in the conversation this hero, under the influence of Vodka goes on to actually say, 'Oh Sweetheart! Leave him and come to me!' (The him part is a story for another day! Right now it should suffice for her to say that she's happy and she's lucky! :)) And to that one statement the visual imagery that kicks into place is way beyond amazing... Before she launches onto that description you need to know that he weighs a very tweensy amount of 53 kgs and she happens to be a very happy and brimming 69kilos!!!!! N wen it comes to lookin at 'em she's double his size and manages to carry him around! (She will definitely get battered for this!) Ok coming back to the image, she visualized, 'Her having pushed 'him' away and running (totally earth shaking considering her size!) towards Shekhar! Shekhar is standing rite in the middle of this garden with the pinkest of flowers fluttering in the sweet breeze with his eyes closed and arms outstretched waiting for her... As she runs full force into his arms both of them crash to the ground and she slowly, yet completely lovingly (dripping with the emotion) looks at him, all starry eyed and has just this one word to say, 'Praannaath!!!!!!!" ' :D

Ok ok.. hold it! It's not over yet! As if that wasn't enough, (he's the guy she calls mommy for a plethora of reasons), Shekhar goes on to add, 'Praanaath, tum mere Mommy ho!'!!!!!!! Ok go ahead... get over the outburst! (~I'm still giggling away to glory though...!) N she plans to say it to him in front of his newly wed wife.. (whenever he decides to get married that is!) :P

So that was that!

She's been a li'l pensive lately... No particular thoughts... jus a rambling of sorts... Sometimes questions of where her life is going, sometimes thoughts of how she has changed... (now even mom has noticed the change and commented!), othertimes an idyllic imagination raging a storm and those rare moments when she's jus lookin faraway onto the horizon and her mind blanks out! She has been low... but riding on the shoulder of a giant sent to her by someone special and exploring the world with a new perspective that you get only when you are way up high has given her a new high! :) The giant thundered his happiness at seeing her smile and laugh with joy and is still there looking on to make sure! :)))) (Loads o thunder n lightning today... I have a happy giant!) :)

Just when you think, 'This is it!' something comes along your way and makes you go, 'Vo Baby!' :)

Quirky li'l me!

2007-05-25T00:46:00.000+05:30

After successfully managing to evade tags by some weird twist of fate since the time I started blogging, the Dream Catcher has tagged me! (Typical k-serial ishtyle... ~mai samajh nahi pa rahi hoon ki hasoon ya roun... ye khushi k aansu hain! and loads o sound effects in the background!) :P

Well...

Step 1: I post the rules. So here are the Rules:

Start with eight random facts/habits about yourself
Post these eight quirks on your blog and also post these rules along with them
At the end of the post.. type in the names of the lucky (eh?) eight who get tagged by you and take this chain forward!

Step 2: My quirks come in now:

I am sooooo..... jinxed! It's like my middle name should have been 'barbaadi' (bole to Disaster!) Anything and everything I lay my hands on has to malfunction once at least if not get permanently destroyed. I have been known to blast a laptop to bits by merely switching on the power to it... More jinxed-pana can be found here and here. I have no idea how I manage it!!
Coffee... there's a coffee mug I have that reads, 'Love is like coffee.. purrfect any time of the day!' Call me an addict of sorts! Have been trying very hard to stay off it for the past few days.... (Gosh it's tuff!) and another sin that I commit is Chocolate! Now who can resist this amazingly delicious dark chocolate truffle called 'Devils Food'??? (can you? can you?) and then there's this other devastating concoction of Truffle with chocolate mousse called 'Death by Chocolate!' (Gosh! I just died n found my heaven!) :D
I have this insane habit of literally staring at a persons hand and and feet the first time I meet them! I have caught myself so many times it's beyond embarrassing now! N its no ordinary stare.. its a very concentrated, open mouthed stare... especially when my attention shifts from the hands and feet to the nose!! Call me eccentric in the weirdest of ways, but you know people with all 3 of these as nice are really sorta nice!! (try it! but don't stare like that!!!!) :D
When I'm alone I put on the craziest of bollywood numbers and dance my heart out to them! (yup! I do do that!... Ok now you all stop staring!)
I'm an sms freak!!! (Lucky me my sms's are free!!) A very dear buddy has gone on to call me 'the official sms spammer!' I', seriously bugging if I lay my hands on your number!! :D Beware!!
I have to match earrings to any outfit that I wear! Its crazy... but if I don't have earrings with something i'll probably not wear it till i go n buy me some!!! That's the girliest thing about me! They have to have to match!!! My 'hathoda haath' (as most of my batch mates describe the maar that they've khaaoed from me) totally defies the previously mentioned girliness but it's there nonetheless! :P
Confession: I can feel auras! Yup.. sit beside me n i'll tell you exactly what colors your aura is at that given moment! (That's a gift n I cherish it!) :)
I AM SHIT SCARED OF THOSE CREEPIEST OF REPTILES CALLED 'LIZARDS'!!! (someone told me they are the successors of dinosaurs... whyyyy???!!!! dino's were so much better!!!)

That's that! and it's been a revelation of sorts!! Dare you use any of this against me!!!!!!

Step 3: Aha! This I like! Eight people I hafta tag:

:D C'mon now! out with your li'l quirks!!!

voices.....

2007-05-23T00:30:00.000+05:30

And a desire is but a lesser dream... or so her heart tells her..

But wishes make each day more meaningful... thats what someone said to her..

She disagrees... life isn't as hollow as a couple of wishes blown together in a bubble waiting to burst any given moment...
Life she thinks is a myriad mix of various emotions... the emotions swell up an take form as the hormones and the DNA... (and she shakes her head in disgust at the science of it all!) But somewhere deep inside her she smiles... a slow smile... at least she knows its got a basis!

DNA... is a whole different ballgame altogether... It's a borrowed concept... The Baba introduced her to it... He said imagine DNA... it's two geometrical twists... connected together in between...

Now consider both ends as the two extremes... good-evil; black-white; pure-impure; yes-no... as it twirls... the ends don't all come on top of each other, they are not aligned... good, white, pure are not in the same line... not in the same space... they may be diagonal to each other sometimes and sometimes may just be opposite... 'what is good is not always pure....!' It explained a lot of things to me! It cleared up the question of, 'Why life is the way it is?!'

Talking of emotions.... hate, love, care, trust... even adore... are all emotions made up by the human mind that the human heart supposedly feels! Dam the heart... its a convoluted mix of arteries and veins which is zonked about it's own functions reversing the names of its most important components! (scary biology!!!) :D

It's the heart we turn to... people have oft been quoted saying, 'dil ki baat sun ni chahiye!' (listen to your heart!) and then many others have said, 'dimaag se kaam lo!' (use your brains!) How do u figure out the difference?? Do they speak in ur ear like, 'Hi! I'm the head - Do this!' and then the heart comes in, introduces itself and goes on to exert its influence on ur life! (i actually got stuck here lolling between where is the influence exerted?? head or life?!)

To me... you just listen to the voice of your conscience! Wow!! a whole new voice now! And where does that come from and what pressure does it exert on which part of you and how and all the other etceteras! Gosh!!! I know... the Baba had once described my question asking habit as this, 'Ek savaal.... recover ho hi raha hota hai ki thodi der me a question shaped crane comes, lift you and swings you over again! and again! and again!' :P

Well... I guess you just listen the voice that's loudest inside you! (don't ask where... i dunno!) :) heart, head, conscience, spirit, soul, devil angel, conscience, gut, intuition... take your pick! But follow it through! It is after all... your own voice!

Another beautiful day, another reason to celebrate!

A typical twilight 'neath the magnolia!

2007-05-19T19:02:00.000+05:30

Pouring rain...! (The rain always does something to her... she can stand there and look at for hours or jus quietly wander into it and splish-splash all over! Her li'l head gets clear... her thoughts run a smoother track... I guess she kind of gets renewed!)

Once it stopped the weather was right out of a dream... cool breeze, the smell of the first rain in the air.. (bheeni bheeni khusboo!) and everything just looked so fresh n new! Her wanderlust took her to the 'Bhopal Haat!' - a place where villagers n tribals put up stuff they've made for sale... Mum's with her and their first stop was a bird seed stall where they'd created beautiful wall hangings out of wheat grains for birds to come and slowly peck it away!! They stopped next at the 'amla' stall... that's their latest fetish! Both of 'em carry it in their handbags all the time so stock had to be replenished!! A handworked handbag and a 'well shaped diya' later they were chit chatting at the tea stall enjoying garma garam adrak ki chai and bhajiye while listening to a local artist belt out bollywood songs to the notes of a guitar and a drum!

That ladies and gentlemen was the Magnolia part! She saw stars when her wrath turned upon herself and she fell from the stairs at home in the process scalding herself with a steaming cup of coffee she was gleefully carrying upstairs with her! :P Her jinxed-pana has off late turned to herself.. She had a minor accident a few days ago as well and the bruises are still pretty damn purple!!! :D

Baaki sab badhiya! (At least the gadgets are behaving themselves! By the way... that's another advantage of being 'Motee'! All the dunlop prevents broken bones from happening inspite of falling down a flight of 'Sweet 16' Steps! :D)

The constants and then some...

2007-05-18T18:35:00.000+05:30

As the first rain of the season poured down on the yellow and red brick wall all she could do was look on in mesmerized silence.... her feet exploring the wet green bunches of grass on a muddy lawn and her heart staring on at the sky... wandering at the mysteries it holds and how many shall unfold!

She'd been wondering recently of the constants in her life! The starkest of them all stand out as the 'press wale uncle!' or the laundryman! Day in and day out.. he comes and takes the clothes and leaves them back! Taking it to another level... her biggest constant has been the smile in her heart! Yes it wanes sometimes... it takes different forms.. but its always there! Dad had looked on to her proudly one day and said, 'She finds her joy in small things! A crsytal champagne flute filled with coke is one her biggest joys!' :) She can't forget the expression on his face as he said that... it's like stuck in her heart!

Her joys and her sadnesses are the tiniest of things... The big things matter.. yes they do! But they've been made possible by the small ones right?! If I go on to describe them then there's just that song from the 'sound of music' that comes to mind...

' Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad'

:) And that's the way it is with me! And then again, 'Happiness is the art of making a bouquet of the flowers within reach!'

Someone once said to me that 'Happiness is an illusion!' My reply to that has always been, 'You are as happy or as sad as you want to be! You just have to look a lil more to find your joy!' :)

Enjoy the monsoons people! (The song on her ipod right now.. 'Jeene ke ishaare mil gaye... Bichhde the kinaare mil gaye!') :)